Behavior quotes

“Bring Tania over here. Marry her. What's wrong with her? When I say marry her, you damn well do it. Be nice to her, pressure off my fucking head. Your penis works, doesn't it? Get going!”

Saeed Jaffrey - Uncle Nasser

“- Jeremy: You were a girl once. Maybe you can teach me how to... you know, how to...
- Mrs. Brisby: Behave yourself?
- Jeremy: I'm not that bad. I just need a few pointers to polish my style.”
Dom DeLuise - Jeremy
Elizabeth Hartman - Mrs. Brisby

“There's an absolute morality? Maybe. And then what? If you think there is, go ahead, be that thing. Bad people go to hell? I don't think so. If you think that, act that way. A hell exists on earth? Yes. I won't live in it. That's me.”
Al Pacino - Ricky Roma

“- IRS Insp. Frank Hall: I know I may be a little new at this but I don't think we shoot people for cheating on their taxes.
- IRS Insp. Derek Lester: Oh. You're right. You are new at this.”
Miguel A. Núñez Jr. - IRS Insp. Frank Hall
Larry Miller - IRS Insp. Derek Lester

“Alice is the good daughter, Eleanor's the bad one, and I'm the one that sort of gets off the hook. It's just the way it works.”
Liv Tyler - Pamela Abbott

“- Miss Clavel: You're giving me a gray hair!
- Madeline: Could I see?
- Miss Clavel: No.”
Frances McDormand - Miss Clavel
Hatty Jones - Madeline

When I was a boy about half past three, my daddy said "Son, come here to me". He said "Things may come and things may go, but this is one thing you ought to know: Tain't what you do it's the way that you do it".
Robert Sean Leonard - Peter Müller

“- Danny Wallace: The ends justify the means, Pops.
- Sean Wallace: The ends is bullshit. The means is what you live with.”
Mark Wahlberg - Danny Wallace
Brian Cox - Sean Wallace

“He used to bring beautiful women here. Eat fine meals, drink fine wine, listen to music... but it always ended with screaming.”

Jeffrey Combs - Crawford Tillinghast

“- Katie Sipriano: You guys are much too well-behaved. High school isn't what it used to be.
- Mike Donnelly: Yeah, it's mostly discipline. No matter how jazzed up and relevant I try to make the history, I'm still dealing with a roomfull of teenage libido.”
Maggie Renzi - Katie
Bruce MacDonald - Mike

“He's like some kind of recluse. Complete freak. No social life. In fact, no social skills. It's a strange fucking thing. When he's working, the smoothest operator you've ever seen. Brave, slick, cunning, can do anything. Soon as he gets off work, it's all gone. Afraid to go to the dry cleaners. Literally. Too uncomfortable in his own skin to go...” (continue)(continue reading)

Ben Stiller - Steve Arlo

“- Pacha: What happened?
- Old Man: Well, I threw off the Emperor's groove.
- Pacha: What?
- Old Man: His groove! The rhythm in which he lives his life. His pattern of behavior. I threw it off. And the Emperor had me thrown out the window.”
John Goodman - Patcha
John Fiedler - Old Man

“I'll leave you alone with that lady. But if you behave like a gentleman, I'll break your neck.”

Miriam Hopkins - Lily

“I want to know one thing: Why, when you get around me, you start to behave like a goddamn, imbecilic, idiotic, totally moronic shithead?”

Jack Lemmon - Felix Ungar

“Let love guide your actions, and one day, you'll be a man, and will place your mark next to those of our ancestors.”
Joan Copeland - Tanana

“- Donnie Darko: How's it feel to have a wacko for a son?
- Rose Darko: It feels wonderful.”
Jake Gyllenhaal - Donnie Darko
Mary McDonnell - Rose Darko

“On occasion the imprinting does not take. They behave erratically when they awaken. We find them wandering like lost children.”

Richard O'Brien - Mr. Hand

“I don't know if I want to be a pretend role model to thousands of little girls... or a real role model to one.”
Minnie Driver - Mona Hibbard

“Donna's arrived. She'll be a hundred and thirty six next month and she still acts like a teenager.”
Charlotte Rae - Miss Cackle

“Pardon my French, but Cameron is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two weeks you'd have a diamond.”
Matthew Broderick - Ferris Bueller

“Everyone's a little irritable after they choke.”

Jason Lee - Jack Withrowe

“- Blair Litton: You think anyone who's proud of the work we do is an ass-kisser.
- Aaron Altman: No, I think anyone who puckers up their lips and presses it against their bosses buttocks and then smooches is an ass-kisser.”
Joan Cusack - Blair Litton
Albert Brooks - Aaron Altman

“I'm so excited. That was my very first felony. I've committed a lot of misdemeanors but I do believe that was my very first felony!”
Oliver Platt - Harvey

“- Yale: You are so self-righteous, you know. I mean we're just people. We're just human beings, you know? You think you're God.
- Isaac: I gotta model myself after someone.”
Michael Murphy - Yale
Woody Allen - Isaac

“- Carol: I want you to look into my eyes. What do you see?
- Picardo: It's dark... and it's cold.
- Carol: It's your future. Keep this up, and you will spend the rest of your life stabbing trash by the highway.”

Elizabeth Mitchell - Carol
Andrew Stone - Picardo