Cheating quotes

“- Jake: Oh my gosh! How do you know Mike Shiner?
- Lesley: We share a vagina.”
Zach Galifianakis - Jake
Naomi Watts - Lesley

“You own a zebra, I own a goat, what the hell does that have to do with cheating on your wife?”
Vince Vaughn - Dave

“It's only adultery. Nobody gives a damn except the people it happens to.”
Kristin A. Scott Thomas - Kay Chandler

“- Rachel: He posted another picture of the baby. It was a cute picture.
- Cathy: Yeah?
- Rachel: Yup.
- Cathy: Facebook and drunk ex-wives do not make good friends.”
Emily Blunt - Rachel
Laura Prepon - Cathy

“- Janey Carver: You're boring me. I have a husband. I don't particularly feel the need for another.
- Ben Hood: You have a point there. That's a very good point. We're having an affair. Right. An explicitly sexual relationship. Your needs, my needs. You're absolutely right.”
Sigourney Weaver - Janey Carver
Kevin Kline - Ben Hood

“- Jacqueline De Bellefort: Simon was mine and he loved me, then she came along and... sometimes, I just want to put this gun right against her head, and ever so gently, pull the trigger. When I hear that sound more and more...
- Hercule Poirot: I know how you feel. We all feel like that at times. However, I must warn you, mademoiselle: Do not...” (continue)(continue reading)
Mia Farrow - Jacqueline De Bellefort
Peter Alexander Ustinov - Hercule Poirot

“- Lilli Hargrave: You lied to me.
- Richard Lestrange: When did I lie to you?
- Lilli Hargrave: You promised you'd never hurt me.
- Richard Lestrange: And when did I hurt you?
- Lilli Hargrave: Every time you stare at her, you hurt me.
- Richard Lestrange: I'm sorry. It's just that she's so different.”
Milla Jovovich - Lilli Hargrave
Brian Krause - Richard Lestrange

“I was supposed to have a baby with my ex-wife. And the doctor who was helping us make the baby did help us make the baby but unfortunately I wasn't in the room.”
Adam Sandler - Brenner

“- Jake La Motta: I heard some things.
- Joey LaMotta: You heard about me and Salvy.
- Jake La Motta: I heard things, Joey.
- Joey LaMotta: Yeah you heard that I cracked Salvy all around. What did you hear?
- Jake La Motta: I heard things, Joey. I heard things.
- Joey LaMotta: What things you heard?
- Jake La Motta: I heard some things.”
Robert De Niro - Jake La Motta
Joe Pesci - Joey

- Sam "Ace" Rothstein: Three fuckin' jackpots in 20 minutes? Why didn't you pull the machines? Why didn't you call me?
- Don Ward: Well, it happened so quick, 3 guys won; I didn't have a chance...
- Sam "Ace" Rothstein: You didn't see the scam? You didn't see what was going on?
- Don Ward: Well, there's no way to determine that...
- Sam "Ace"... (continue)(continue reading)
Robert De Niro - Sam "Ace" Rothstein
John Bloom - Don Ward

“Regardless of the verdict of juries... no player who throws a ball game... no player who undertakes, or promises to throw a game... no player who sits in conference with a bunch of crooked players and gamblers where the ways and means of throwing a ball game are discussed, and does not promptly tell his club about it... will never play...” (continue)(continue reading)
John Anderson - Judge Kenesaw Mountain Landis

“All men cheat. That’s why they’re called trade. Do them just as dirty as they do us.”
Mya Taylor - Alexandra

“- Dave Brown: You wanna cuddle later?
- Barbara: I have a boyfriend.
- Dave Brown: Cheat on him.
- Barbara: Like you cheat on your taxes?”
Woody Harrelson - Dave Brown
Cynthia Nixon - Barbara

“- Scott Thomas: What do you mean you're dumping me?
- Fiona: Scott, I just can't take all the lying and cheating on each other anymore.
- Scott Thomas: What are you talking about? Sweetie, I never cheated on you!
- Fiona: I know. That's what makes this so hard.”
Scott Mechlowicz - Scott Thomas
Kristin Kreuk - Fiona

“- Clairee Belcher: I can also report that a mysterious car is parked in her driveway at least once a week.
- Ouiser Boudreaux: There. My secrets out. I'm having an affair with a Mercedes Benz!”
Olympia Dukakis - Clairee Belcher
Shirley MacLaine - Ouiser Boudreaux

“I don't cheat on my taxes, you can't cheat on something you never committed to.”
Woody Harrelson - Dave Brown

“You can't cheat death. There are no escapes.”

Tony Todd - Mr. Bludworth

“You know, you could fool anybody with this cheap suit, salesman-of-the-year pitch. But I know you better than anybody and deep down, you are one miserable son of a bitch.”

Chris Marquette - Linus

“- Helen Drood: She's a model, right?
- C.C Drood: No. She's a secretary.”

Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio - Helen Drood
Tom Hulce - C.C. Drood

“- Raleigh St. Clair: You've made a cuckold of me.
- Margot Tenenbaum: I know.
- Raleigh St. Clair: Many times over.
- Margot Tenenbaum: I'm sorry.
- Raleigh St. Clair: And you nearly killed your poor brother.”
Bill Murray - Raleigh St. Clair
Gwyneth Paltrow - Margot Tenenbaum

“You kissed him! At My Parents’ house! On my wedding day!”
Cameron Diaz - Kimberly Wallace

“- Viktor Navorski: He chit, he chit, he chit.
- Enrique Cruz: Okay, try to repeat exactly what she said.
- Viktor Navorski: He chit, she catch him so...
- Enrique Cruz: Oh! He cheats!
- Viktor Navorski: Yes, yes, yes! What we call Krushkach. We say Krushkach. One man, two womans. Crowded, you know?”
Tom Hanks - Viktor Navorski
Diego Luna - Enrique Cruz

“- Lynn: You think I've forgotten that you cheated on me twice?
- Monix: I only cheated on you once. There just had to be two women.”
Maura Tierney - Lynn
Woody Harrelson - Monix

“Because I am mad, I have betrayed you. And because I'm mad, I'm rejoicing in my heart, without a shred of pity, without a shred of regret, watching you go with glory in my heart!”

Ingrid Bergman - Paula Alquist

“If you're a rat, then I'm the biggest mutt in the history of the Mafia.”
Al Pacino - Lefty