Doctors quotes

“First you told me he was gonna be retarded, then you told me he was gonna be blind and deaf. If I'd dug his grave every time one of you geniuses told me he was gonna die, I'd be eating fuckin' chop suey in China by now!”

Cher - Rusty Dennis

“- Dexter King: How was your day?
- Kate: Not great. A nurses's day is always pretty grisly. A woman I was with gave birth to a baby in a lift.
- Dexter King: Well, that was okay, er?
- Kate: It would have been, but her husband slipped on the afterbirth and broke his collarbone.”
Jeff Goldblum - Dexter King
Emma Thompson - Kate

“- Mrs. Doctor Graves: Poor Daddy's been under such a strain recently.
- Mary Graves: If you ask me, he's acting like he just killed someone.
- Mrs. Doctor Graves: Mary! Your father's a doctor... He kills people every day.”
Stella Stevens - Mrs. Doctor Graves
Julia Duffy - Mary Graves

“- Jodie Trammel: You made a moral choice and not a medical one. I guess I'm kind of surprised, that's all.
- Dr. Guy Luthan: On my right I see a cop with pictures of his kids in his wallet, and on my left some guy who's taken out a gun on a city bus! I had ten seconds to make a choice. I hope I made the right one.”

Sarah Jessica Parker - Jodie Trammel
Hugh Grant - Dr. Guy Luthan

“- Dr. Parker: [about to give Binky Shelton a shot] Don't worry, it will only take one little prick.
- Binky Shelton: That's what got me into this trouble in the first place!”
Roy Brocksmith - Dr. Parker
Deborah Rush - Binky Shelton

“- Dr. Werner Ernst: If he's going to die, why should we proceed?
- Dr. Butz: Where have you been all your life? It's called revenue!”
James Spader - Dr. Werner Ernst
Albert Brooks - Dr. Butz

“Never date a man who knows more about your vagina than you do.”
Robin Bartlett - Anne

“Time to do what doctors do best.”

Larry Drake - Doctor Evan Rendell

“- Baron Jeffreys: Did you know the law that any person who does knowingly receive, harbor, comfort or succor a rebel is as guilty as if he himself bore arms?
- Peter Blood: I only knew my sacred duty as a physician.”
Leonard Mudie - Baron Jeffreys
Errol Flynn - Peter Blood

“- Dr. Wynn: It's no prank; you're the one I've chosen Sam. I want you to come back.
- Dr. Loomis: After my stroke six years ago they practically had to hold a pistol to my head to get me to retire. But things are different now, I'm different. I've buried the ghosts, I've buried them in this manuscript. I don't want to practise medicine anymore.”
Mitchell Ryan - Dr. Wynn
Donald Pleasence - Loomis

“You using the whole fist, Doc?”

Chevy Chase - Irwin 'Fletch' Fletcher

“- Augusto Odone: They've got Lorenzo on a turvy-topsy diet. And that bloody immunosuppression is brutal and useless. Michaela, we should not have consigned him blindly into their hands. He should not suffer by our ignorance. We take responsibility. So... we read a little. And we go out and inform ourselves.
- Michaela Odone: But... to miss time...” (continue)(continue reading)

Nick Nolte - Augusto Odone
Susan Sarandon - Michaela Odone

“- Caroline: What did the doctor say?
- Adam: That I'm not allowed to stick knives in my stomach.”
Marisa Tomei - Caroline
Christian Slater - Adam

“- Prosecuting Attorney: Dr. Stone, would you give the court your impression of Mr. Striker?
- Dr. Stone: I'm sorry, I don't do impressions, my training is in psychiatry.”
John Larch - Prosecuting Attorney
John Vernon - Dr. Stone

“If you have a medical opinion, then please speak up and speak up loud. But if you ever again tell me or my surgical staff that we're going to lose a patient, I'm gonna take out your lungs with a fucking ice cream scoop.”
Alec Baldwin - Jed

“You should never traumatize a woman sexually. I should know, I'm a medical doctor.”
Lori Capp - Traumatized Yacht Owner

- Dr. Berger: So you felt great. You brought home a Christmas tree and everything was hunky dory. Okay?
- Conrad "Con" Jarrett: You're the doctor.
- Dr. Berger: Listen, don't take refuge in one-liners like "you're the doctor". Okay? Because that pisses me off.
- Conrad "Con" Jarrett: Okay.
Judd Hirsch - Berger
Timothy Hutton - Conrad

“- Dr. Bronson: I'm afraid I have some bad news. Your boy is very sick. He's lost a massive amount of blood, and his pulse and retinal response are poor, and as you can see there's an axe sticking out of his head.
- Big Chuck: He's not sick, you idiot, he's dead!
- Dr. Bronson: Oh, everybody's a doctor. You think maybe I could make the diagnosis?”
Austin Pendleton - Dr. Bronson
Paul Dooley - Big Chuck

“- Maxwell: I'm a doctor and I believe in the spirit world.
- Andrew: You have to, Maxwell, that's where all your patients end up.”
Tony Roberts - Maxwell
Woody Allen - Andrew

“Seeing patients is a waste of time.”
Philip Bosco - Dr. Hofstader

“- Gus: I swear to God, you hit that kid one more time and I will stick that pig's head right up your ass!
- Connie: Gary, are you gonna let him talk to me like that?
- Gary Chasseur: Well, he is a doctor.”
Denis Colin Leary - Gus
Christine Baranski - Connie