Doctors quotes

“- George: I want to be a gynecologist.
- Miss Marquez: If that's so then I want good reasons why.
- George: You are the reason why, Miss Marquez.”
Mario Yedidia - George
Jennifer Lopez - Miss Marquez

“- Dr. Deere: Maximilian, how very good of you to be so punctual!
- Max: The name is Vandeveer. I don't wish to be on first name terms with anyone who's had their fingers up my rectum.”
John Le Mesurier - Dr. Deere
Robert Morley - Max

I just wonder about some of these brilliant doctors of mine, you know, with their minds for medicine and their hearts for, what, real estate. You know, I wonder what they'd say to some lonely terrified patient, who grabs their hand and says, "Can you explain this to me? Can you help me accept this? Can you at least sit with me so I don't feel so... (continue)(continue reading)
Christine Lahti - Dr. Rachel Woodruff

“You haven't your medical all-star here. Company doctors are like ship's doctors. Most are just one shuttle flight ahead of a malpractice suit.”

Frances Sternhagen - Lazarus

“- O'Niel: Are you Dr. Lazarus?
- Lazarus: Yes. Take two aspirin and call me in the morning. That's a doctor joke.”
Sir Sean Connery - O'Niel
Frances Sternhagen - Lazarus

“What would you prescribe for a patient about to die of galloping boredom?”
Myrna Loy - Lady Edwina Esketh

“- Henry Sikorsky: I'm the doctor until the doctor comes back!
- Billy Caufield: Okay, you be the doctor and I'll be the escaped mental patient, okay?”
Chris Lloyd - Henry Sikorsky
Michael Keaton - Billy Caufield

“Our society faces momentous decisions. Decisions about the right to die. About abortion. About terminal illness, prolonged coma, transplantation. Decisions about life and death. But society isn't deciding. Congress isn't deciding. The courts aren't deciding. Religion isn't deciding. Why? Because society is leaving it up to us, the experts. The...” (continue)(continue reading)
Rip Torn - Dr. George

“- Joe: I still have a problem. I have a brain cloud.
- Patricia: A brain cloud... what is a brain cloud?
- Joe: It's - well, maybe I should get a second opinion.
- Patricia: You didn't get a second opinion on something called a brain cloud? I mean what are you, a hypochondriac?”
Tom Hanks - Joe
Meg Ryan - Patricia

“- Joe Finley: Doctors don't know everything.
- Ben Luckett: Well there is the one school of thought that says they don't know nothing.”
Hume Cronyn - Joe Finley
Wilford Brimley - Ben Luckett

“I'm a doctor, not a detective.”
Etienne Girardot - Dr. Doremus

“Dad has a patient who thinks he shits trout.”
Kyle Sabihy - Michael Sobel

“He was the chief doctor of Auschwitz, who killed 2.5 million people, experimented with children - Jewish and non-Jewish - using twins mostly, injecting blue dyes into their eyes to make them acceptable Aryans... amputating limbs and organs from thousands without anesthetics.”

Laurence Olivier - Ezra Lieberman

“I guess the only way I can get a man to come to see me is to call a doctor.”
Beatrice Blinn - Mimi

- Quentin: We got an escape artist and a cop. There's gotta be a reason for that. You're a doctor. That gives you a function, a reason, right?
- Holloway: No! It just makes me go "Why me and not one of the other ten million doctors out there?".

Maurice Dean Wint - Quentin
Nicky Guadagni - Holloway

“- Peter Kirk: Are there many lady doctors?
- Helen Hunt: A few.
- Peter Kirk: As beautiful as you?
- Helen Hunt: No doubt.
- Peter Kirk: The time I've wasted being well.”
Henry Fonda - Peter Kirk
Barbara Stanwyck - Helen Hunt

“- Marcus: Rule Number One: Don't get involved with patients. Rule Number Two: don't get involved with patients' daughters, now do you understand that?
- Frank Pierce: What about Rule Number Three: Don't get involved with dispatchers named Love?
- Marcus: Boy, you don't know nothin' bout Rule Number Three! Can't even begin to understand the...” (continue)(continue reading)
Ving Rhames - Marcus
Nicolas Cage - Frank Pierce

“I'm dying. I know this because my physician has stopped talking about my health and begun discussing the weather.”
Albert Finney - Uncle Henry

“I'm a doctor, not a magician.”
Etienne Girardot - Dr. Doremus

“Goddamn it, I knew I should've listened to my mother. I could've been a cosmetic surgeon, five hundred thousand a year, up to my neck in tits and ass.”
Michael Douglas - Jack T. Colton

“- Rick Gassko: Diagnoses?
- Dr. Stan Gassko: Medically speaking?
- Rick Gassko: Yes.
- Dr. Stan Gassko: Whacked out of his brains on drugs.”
Tom Hanks - Rick Gassko
William Tepper - Dr. Stan Gassko

“- Jon: You let your patients smoke in here?
- Head Nurse: Honey, they're all gonna die of something sooner or later.”

Tom Selleck - Jon Aldrich
Doris Carey - Nurse

“- Young Man in Coffee Shop: You know I was thinking, I don't want you to be my doctor. I don't want you to examine me.
- Susan Parrish: Why?
- Young Man in Coffee Shop: Because I like you so much.”
Brad Pitt - Young Man in Coffee Shop
Claire Forlani - Susan Parrish

“When those lawyers start crawling all over you, that's when you know you're a doctor.”
Albert Brooks - Dr. Butz

“- Dr. Werner Ernst: It's important to say we did as much as we could.
- Stella: Which is doctor-speak for we put this patient through hell before he died.”
James Spader - Dr. Werner Ernst
Helen Mirren - Stella