Marriage quotes

“I married Bob, for you! I had sex with Bob four times for you! So how can you call me a bad mother?”

Catherine O'Hara - Cindy Beugler

“- Hallie: Whaddya mean, getting married?
- Annie: I mean black tie, white gown, the whole enchilada. The wedding's in two weeks so, if there's any hope of getting Mom and Dad back together, we've got to do it fast.”
Lindsay Lohan - Hallie Parker
Lindsay Lohan - Annie James

“- Tim Whalen: There's nothing in the world I'd rather do than marry you but I - I just don't think you know enough about me.
- Olivia Lawrence: You rob banks or something?
- Tim Whalen: Bounce checks.
- Olivia Lawrence: For a living?
- Tim Whalen: When I quit school, I got caught in Cincinnati with no money. Wrote a lot of checks on a closed...” (continue)(continue reading)
Rob Lowe - Tim Whalen
Meg Tilly - Olivia Lawrence

“Marriage is just legalized prostitution, my dear.”
Camryn Manheim - Virginia Cranehill

“- Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: Oh. Ethan married a Catholic girl and that did not go over well.
- Anna Riley: That's why they're fighting?
- Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: They're not fighting, they're not talking. Two years now no communicando.”
Edward Norton - Father Brian Finn
Jenna Elfman - Anna Riley

“I'm sick of these conventional marriages. One woman and one man was good enough for your grandmother, but who wants to marry your grandmother? Nobody, not even your grandfather.”
Groucho Marx - Captain Jeffrey Spaulding

“- Detective: She's got a violent record, assault with a deadly weapon. Did you know that when you married her?
- Joaquin Manero: It's why I married her.”
Rick Rossovich - Detective
Raul Julia - Joaquin Manero

“- Songlian's mother: Rich man? If you marry a rich man, you will only be his concubine.
- Songlian: Let me be a concubine. Isn't that the fate of a woman?”
Weimin Ding - Songlian's mother
Li Gong - Songlian

“In this, you exist. In another you don't exist. In another, you're married to the same woman. In another, you're married to a different woman. In another, you're married to a man.”

Jason Statham - MVA Agent Evan Funsch

“- Mama: Boy didn't marry her for her cooking...
- Randy Sue Carter: He didn't marry me, period.”
Rosetta LeNoire - Mama
Caroline Aaron - Randy Sue Carter

“- Barfly: This is too much. I'm wearing red, you're wearing red. That's quite a coincidence...
- Ann Bishop Mullany: Look, I'm married.
- Barfly: Really? Are you very married?
- Ann Bishop Mullany: Married enough.”
Steven Brill - Barfly
Andie MacDowell - Ann Bishop Mullany

“I'll be the one who's gonna decide who my husband should marry!”
Demi Moore - Marina Lemke

- Bill Cardew: My best man... offering a toast. "To Bill" he says "the one man in the world I'd gladly die for".
- Henry Lowndes: Did I say that?
- Bill Cardew: I'm ready. Let's see you gladly die.

Fred MacMurray - Bill Cardew
Melvyn Douglas - Henry Lowndes

“- Fletcher Reede: Are you marrying this guy because you're mad at me?
- Audrey Reede: No, I divorced you because I was mad at you.”
Jim Carrey - Fletcher Reede
Maura Tierney - Audrey Reede

“What if in a few years we don't marry some corporate lawyer? What if we marry some meatball, like you? Or not you, personally, but someone with similarly low socioeconomic prospects.”

Kate Beckinsale - Charlotte

“- Simon: What are you, a boy scout? No, no, no, think of it as playing a role as fantasy. I mean, you got to work on their dreams. Get them out of their daily surburban grind for a few hours.
- Harry Tasker: But what about their husbands?
- Simon: Dickless! I mean, let's face it, if they took care of business, I'd be out of business! You know...” (continue)(continue reading)

Bill Paxton - Simon
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Harry Tasker

“- Jim Brogan: Lola, if you're really that serious, let's get married.
- Lola Burns: Oh, no, Jim, no.
- Jim Brogan: You changed your mind since this morning.”
Pat O'Brien - Jim Brogan
Jean Harlow - Lola Burns

“Guys like him like girls with food names. Cookie, Muffin, Candy. They don't marry girls like me.”
Kirstie Alley - Diane Barrows

“It's a waste of time to take a married man to Hell.”
Roland Young - Jimmy Wade

“- George Banks: Swans?
- Annie Banks: Yes, Frank thought it'd be nice to have swans waddling around the tulip border.
- George Banks: We don't have a tulip border.
- Andrea - the Florist: [handing him a bill] You will.”
Steve Martin - George Banks
Kimberly Williams-Paisley - Annie Banks
Martha Gehman - Andrea - the Florist

“- Hallie O'Fallon: I'm gonna ask Santa to get them back together again so we can have us back together again.
- Ethan O'Fallon: Now look Hallie, you can't ask Santa Claus for that
- Hallie O'Fallon: Why not?
- Ethan O'Fallon: Well because... he's jolly... he's a jolly fat guy and not a marriage counseller.”

Thora Birch - Hallie O'Fallon
Ethan Embry - Ethan O'Fallon

“Someone to share the little things with...”

Jill Eikenberry - Dottie

“- Ellie: Our marriage wasn't going anywhere.
- Val: Where do you want it to go? Where do marriages go? After a while they just lay there. That's the thing about marriages.”
Téa Leoni - Ellie
Woody Allen - Val

“- Charlie Mackenzie: Marry me.
- Harriet Michaels: No.
- Charlie Mackenzie: Please?”
Mike Myers - Charlie Mackenzie
Nancy Travis - Harriet Michaels

“I'm not interested in your goddamn vagina, all right? I just want to marry you!”

Chris O'Donnell - Jimmie Shannon