Thieves quotes

“- Slide: A robbery can change very quickly. You have to be ready to adapt to the situation at any moment. Anything can happen. I was on a job a few days ago and my homie got shot in the face!
- Josh Kovacs: If you get shot in the face, it's over.
- Slide: If you get shot in your head, it's over. If you get shot in your face, the bullet will go...” (continue)(continue reading)
Eddie Murphy - Slide
Ben Stiller - Josh Kovacs
Casey Affleck - Cole Howard

“- Greta: Mr. Reede, several years ago a friend of mine had a burglar on her roof, a burglar. He fell through the kitchen skylight, landed on a cutting board, on a butcher's knife, cutting his leg. The burglar sued my friend, he sued my friend. And because of guys like you he won. My friend had to pay the burglar $6,000. Is that justice?
-...” (continue)(continue reading)
Anne Haney - Greta
Jim Carrey - Fletcher Reede

“Wait! I didn't steal anything! I was returning something I stole!”

Paul Rudd - Scott Lang

“- Zed: Mickey! He's dead! He killed him!
- Laura: I'm sure the academy will pay for it.
- Zed: No, you don't understand. It's like a sentimental thing. It was the last thing I stole before joining the academy.”

Bobcat Goldthwait - Zed
Corinne Bohrer - Laura

“- Punk: Get outta the car, bitch, or I'm gonna blow your brains out!
- Donny Astricky: You gotta be shittin' me...
- Punk: Do I have shoot you, dammn it?
[Donny takes his gun and knocks him out]
- Freb: Damn!
- Donny Astricky: You lazy, half-ass bully! Any asshole can pull a gun on somebody! You don't know the first thing about stealing a car!...” (continue)(continue reading)

Chi McBride - Donny Astricky
James Duval - Freb

“My Dad never bought me a Ferrari. I had to steal my first one.”
Mel Gibson - Porter

“- Miles Logan: All right check this out: This is a Brigga 3300, toughest safe in the world. What's the first thing you do?
- Eddie: Drill the lock.
- Miles Logan: No! You got to check to see if it's open.
- Miles Logan: It's open!
- Eddie: Really?
- Miles Logan: Nah I'm messin' wit- I'm messing with you! They would never do that! Now Eddie, you...” (continue)(continue reading)
Martin Lawrence - Miles Logan
John Hawkes - Eddie

“- Nic: Don't kill me! Don't kill me, man! Don't kill me! Don't kill me, man!
- Batman: I'm not going to kill you. I want you to do me a favor. I want you to tell all your friends about me.
- Nic: What are you?
- Batman: I'm Batman.”

Christopher Fairbank - Nic
Michael Keaton - Batman

“- Jessie: You sell little fucking cars, that's what you do.
- Frank: I wear $150 slacks, I wear silk shirts, I wear $800 suits, I wear a gold watch, I wear a perfect, D-flawless three carat ring. I change cars like other guys change their fucking shoes. I'm a thief. I've been in prison, all right?”
Tuesday Weld - Jessie
James Caan - Frank

“- Lil' Pete: Hey, friend. Need any help getting her out?
- Ramon: She's not really stuck, amigo. She's just a diversion.
- Lil' Pete: She's a virgin? I'm a virgin, too... unless you count cantaloupes.
- Ramon: I believe that, but she's a diversion to keep the banker busy so that my brother has time to rob the bank.
- Lil' Pete: You're robbing...” (continue)(continue reading)
Taylor Lautner - Lil Pete
Rob Schneider - Ramon

“I once handed a date my Visa so she could pump gas for me, and on my next statement, there were charges for a boob job and a PlayStation 3. And I never got to play with either one of them.”
Charlie Sheen - Charlie Harper

“Eric Forman- Kelso, aren't you a little old to be stealing Donna's undies?
Michael Kelso-A collector never stops collecting, Eric.”
Christopher Grace - Eric Forman
Ashton Kutcher - Michael Kelso

“Yelena Belova-You can't just steal a guy's car.
Natasha Romanoff-So you want me to chase him down and un-steal it?”
Scarlett Johansson - Natasha Romanoff
Florence Pugh - Yelena Belova

“I can understand someone wanting to steal a pair of boots - but one? Well, there it is.”
Sir Christopher Lee - Sir Henry

“I'm not shopping at this store - I'm robbing this store. Paying is for dummies!”
Margot Robbie - Harley Quinn

“If you're going to have a problem with stealing, then you're not going to like the rest of this conversation.”
Sandra Bullock - Debbie Ocean

“When ya steal from the government, you're stealing from yourself, ya dumb ox.”
Judy Holliday - Billie Dawn

“- Frank Hamer: You ever think maybe there was something in Clyde... that made him steal that chicken in the first place?
- Henry Barrow: Maybe he was hungry. Maybe we were all hungry.”
Kevin Costner - Frank Hamer
William Sadler - Henry Barrow

“Is it stealing if you steal from another thief?”
Gal Gadot - Diana Prince

“Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions. Conservatives feel they deserve everything they've stolen.”
Mort Sahl

“It's not too often that you rob a place and then you get welcomed back.”
Michael Peña - Luis

“- Commander Lin Mae: Why are you here?
- William: We came to trade.
- Commander Lin Mae: You lie. You are thieves!”
Tian Jing - Commander Lin Mae
Matt Damon - William

“- Gny. Sgt. Hartman: Private Pyle, if there is one thing in this world that I hate, it is an unlocked footlocker! You know that don't you?
- Pvt. Leonard 'Gomer Pyle' Lawrence: Sir, yes, sir.
- Gny. Sgt. Hartman: If it wasn't for dickheads like you, there wouldn't be any thievery in this world, would there?”

R. Lee Ermey - Gny. Sgt. Hartman
Vincent D'Onofrio - Pvt. Leonard 'Gomer Pyle' Lawrence

“Gentlemen do not steal ladies' crowns!”
Jennifer Saunders - The Queen

“- Nancy: What does that tattoo mean?
- Kurt: It was given to me in juvie. I was caught stealing cherries. I'm a... I'm a cherry thief.”
Malin Akerman - Nancy
Adam Devine - Kurt