Steve Martin movie quotes

Never underestimate the power of belief, boy. With it, I've seen a mute sing "Hallelujah" and I've seen an old man get out of his wheelchair and dance. When you've got it, you've got the power of every ocean and every star right in your hand. Without it you've got nothing. Everyone you meet is just another sinner, and everywhere you go is just... (continue)(continue reading)
Steve Martin - Jonas

“- Lawrence Jamieson: Do you ever have a single thought that originates from above the waist?
- Freddy Benson: No!”
Sir Michael Caine - Lawrence Jamieson
Steve Martin - Freddy Benson

“- Lost Baggage Clerk: Where are you staying in the Boston area?
- Henry Clark: In the Boston area we are staying in New York.”
William Duell - Lost Baggage Clerk
Steve Martin - Henry Clark

“All I ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work.”
Steve Martin - Master Sergeant Ernest G. Bilko

“- Trudi: He said it's the first day of spring.
- Harris K. Telemacher: Oh shit! Open season on the L.A. freeway!”
Marilu Henner - Trudi
Steve Martin - Harris K. Telemacher

“- Warren: Ever think of getting a dog?
- Larry: A dog!
- Warren: Dogs are great. They leap all over you. They lick your face. They don't even have to like you. It's their instinct. Hitler had a dog. That dog went crazy over him.”
Charles Grodin - Warren
Steve Martin - Larry

“A town this deep in the crapper's got nowhere to turn but God!”
Steve Martin - Jonas

“I used to think a wedding was a simple affair. Boy and girl meet, they fall in love, he buys a ring, she buys a dress, they say I do. I was wrong. That's getting married. A wedding is an entirely different proposition.”
Steve Martin - George Banks

“I've never seen so many brains out of their heads before! I feel like a kid in a candy store.”

Steve Martin - Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr

“- Neal Page: What do you think the temperature is?
- Del Griffith: One.”

Steve Martin - Neal Page
John Candy - Del Griffith

“I knew I can't make those movies anymore. I can't make another piece of art that glorifies violence and bloodshed and brutality. I can't contribute another stone to this landslide of dehumanising rage that has swept across this country like a pestilence.”
Steve Martin - Davis

“- Del Griffith: You're in a pretty lousy mood, huh?
- Neal Page: To say the least.
- Del Griffith: You ever travel by bus before?
[Neal Page shakes his head]
- Del Griffith: Hmm. Your mood's probably not going to improve much.”
John Candy - Del Griffith
Steve Martin - Neal Page

“The point is there's a gulf in this country; an ever-widening abyss between the people who have stuff, and the people who don't have shit. It's like this big hole in the ground, as big as the fucking Grand Canyon, and what's come pouring out is an eruption of rage, and the rage creates violence, and the violence is real.”

Steve Martin - Davis

“- Butler: You and your wife are expected for dinner.
- Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: My wife won't be coming.
- Butler: Oh, I trust she is not ill?
- Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: She's not ill, she's a cheap, vulgar slut.
- Butler: Ja, I have heard this.”
Paul Benedict - Butler
Steve Martin - Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr

“I’ve got culture coming out of my ass.”
Steve Martin - Freddy Benson

“- Gas Station Attendant: Boy, get to work in there!
- Navin: But sir, I don't even work here.
- Gas Station Attendant: Not even for $1.10 an hour?”
Steve Martin - Navin

“- Dolores: I can't wait till next Thursday.
- Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: Today is Monday.
- Dolores: I know, but my headache should be gone by then.”
Kathleen Turner - Dolores Benedict
Steve Martin - Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr

“- Butler: Can I get you anything more, doctor? I'm about to retire.
- Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: Really? You seem so young.”
Paul Benedict - Butler
Steve Martin - Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr

“- Frank: Gil, you have a good memory. Uh, was it yours or Helen's or Susan's wedding I got drunk at?
- Gil: It was all three, Dad. Congratulations.”
Jason Robards - Frank
Steve Martin - Gil

“- Neal Page: He says we're going the wrong way...
- Del Griffith: Oh, he's drunk. How would he know where we're going?”

Steve Martin - Neal Page
John Candy - Del Griffith

“I'm just asking you to hear yourself. Listen to what you're really saying and under what you really saying: control, control, control. When are you gonna realise nothing can be controlled? We live in chaos. It's the central issue in everyone's life.”

Steve Martin - Davis

“- Olsen: Doctor, were you interested in science as a child?
- Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: I don't know if I was interested so much in the science as I was in the slime that goes along with it. Snakes and frogs. When I saw how slimy the human brain was, I knew that's what I wanted to do with the rest of my life.”
Francis X. McCarthy - Olsen
Steve Martin - Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr

“How's the turtle Mrs. Stubbs? Did your kids ever figure out you switched turtles on them? Because I know it would be a major disappointment for them to find out.”

Steve Martin - Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli

“- Harris K. Telemacher: Ordinarily, I don't like to be around interesting people because it means I have to be interesting too.
- Sara McDowel: Are you saying I'm interesting?
- Harris K. Telemacher: All I'm saying is that, when I'm around you, I find myself showing off, which is the idiot's version of being interesting.”
Steve Martin - Harris K. Telemacher
Victoria Tennant - Sara McDowel

“I notice you don't have any tattoos. I think that's a wise choice. I don't think Jackie Onassis would've gone as far if she'd have had an anchor on her arm.”
Steve Martin - C. D. Bales