Genitalia quotes

“- Pervert on Phone: Come on, be a good little girl and put your vagina up to the phone!
- Shelley: Shove it, fuckwad!”
John Waters - Pervert on Phone
Christina Ricci - Shelley

“- Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: For the experiment to be a success, all of the body parts must be enlarged.
- Inga: His veins, his feet, his hands, his organs vould all have to be increased in size.
- Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Precisely.
- Inga: [her eyes get wide] He vould have an enormous schwanzschtücker.
- Dr. Frederick Frankenstein:...” (continue)(continue reading)

Gene Wilder - Dr. Frederick Frankenstein
Teri Garr - Inga
Marty Feldman - Igor

“- Elmer Fishpaw: How's my baby doing in school?
- Lu-Lu Fishpaw: I learned all about my cervix in sex education yesterday!”
David Samson - Elmer Fishpaw
Mary Garlington - Lu-Lu Fishpaw

“- Jake Wise: Look, I was a bit of an asshole. You know, I got crazy and I popped her a few times, she came after me with a knife. Just missed my balls.
- Terry Brogan: And was she going for them?
- Jake Wise: Don't they all?”
James Woods - Jake Wise
Jeff Bridges - Terry Brogan

“You stand on the brink of greatness. The world will open to you like an oyster. No... not like an oyster. The world will open to you like a magnificent vagina.”
Dianne Wiest - Helen Sinclair

“A brother's dick is too big, so it'll fuck up his balance... Every time you see a brother in a wheelchair, he ain't always crippled.”
Eddie Murphy - Eddie Murphy

“- Lisa Bentwright: Jimmy, Jimmy can I see it? Won't something happen?
- Jimmy Reardon: Not if I don't want it to.
- Lisa Bentwright: It looks funny.
- Jimmy Reardon: Do you wanna hurt it's feelings?”

Meredith Salenger - Lisa Bentwright
River Phoenix - Jimmy Reardon

“- Donna: Cameras are so... phallic.
- Jim: Is that good or bad?
- Donna: Depends who's watching.”
Daisy McCrackin - Donna
Luke Kirby - Jim

“- Joe Gideon: Kate, I try to give you everything I can give.
- Kate Jagger: You give all right; presents, clothes. I just wish you weren't so generous with your cock.”
Roy Scheider - Joe Gideon
Ann Reinking - Kate Jagger

“Whether or not I like someone doesn't depend on what kind of genitals they have.”
Anne Carlisle - Margaret

“- Terry Thorne: So what are you ladies celebrating?
- Dino: Life, liberty, and the ability to purchase clitoris.”
Russell Crowe - Terry Thorne
David Caruso - Dino

“- Daniel: Oh, great. Now I'm impotent.
- Robin: We just kissed for two seconds?
- Daniel: No, it never takes me this long. Usually we're showering by now!”
Michael J. Fox - Daniel
Nancy Travis - Robin

“What's the definition of a vagina? The box a penis comes in.”
Andrew Dice Clay - Ford Fairlane

“- Davey: Can I prance around with my morning erection?
- Whitey: If you do you'll want an automatic ejection cause that's a technical foul!
- Eleanor: But I would like to see it anyway!”
Adam Sandler - Davey
Adam Sandler - Whitey
Adam Sandler - Eleanore

“- Papa Klump: What I do in my bedroom is my business, you understand that?
- Granny Klump: The only thing you do in your bedroom is pull the lint off your scrotum!”
Eddie Murphy - Papa Klump
Eddie Murphy - Granny Klump

“- Dr. Elizabeth Simms: You won't make any progress until you recognize your dreams for what they are.
- Nancy Thompson: And what are they?
- Dr. Elizabeth Simms: The by-products of guilt. Psychological scars stemming from moral conflicts and overt sexuality.
- Kincaid: Great. Now it's my dick that's killing me.”
Priscilla Pointer - Dr. Elizabeth Simms
Heather Langenkamp - Nancy Thompson
Ken Sagoes - Kincaid

“- Chris Knight: So, if there's anything I can do for you or, more to the point, to you just let me know.
- Susan Decker: Can you hammer a six-inch spike through a board with your penis?
- Chris Knight: Not right now.
- Susan Decker: A girl's gotta have her standards.”
Val Kilmer - Chris Knight
Deborah Foreman - Susan Decker

- Johnny Murata: Kenner, just in case we get killed, I wanted to tell you, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen on a man.
- Chris Kenner: Thanks. I don't know what to say.
- Johnny Murata: How about "Don't get killed"?
Brandon Lee - Johnny Murata
Dolph Lundgren - Sgt. Chris Kenner

“- Jackie Willow: Sarge! I need another favor.
- Sgt. Clell Hazard: Great. Let's see... you got my money, you got my car. I guess now you need my dick to seal the deal!”
D.B. Sweeney - Jackie Willow
James Caan - Sgt. Clell Hazard

“My pussy is the gateway to my soul.”
Heather Graham - Sharonna

“- Jo Bob Priddy: Where's your gun, Elliott?
- Phillip Elliott: Freud says that guns are an extension of your dick, Jo Bob.”
Bo Svenson - Jo Bob Priddy
Nick Nolte - Phillip Elliott

- Mary's Dad: Is it the "frank" or the "beans"?
- Ted: I don't know, both I guess.
- Warren: [from outside] "Franks" and "beans"! "Franks" and "beans"!
- Mary's Dad: Oh man! How'd you get the "beans" above the "frank"?

Keith David - Mary's Dad
Ben Stiller - Ted
W. Earl Brown - Warren

“She keeps peeling and peeling until you're left there butt naked, totally exposed with your balls blowing in the wind. And that's when she gets her knife, and she cuts away your manhood piece by piece until she's having your cock in her corn flakes.”

Edward Burns - Barry McMullen

“- Helen Gordon: You're making a noise.
- Harold Anderson: That's my penis. It hums.
- Helen Gordon: I guess it doesn't know the words. Well, I can teach it a few.”
Linda Fiorentino - Helen Gordon
Garry Shandling - Harold Anderson

- Dr. Alex Hesse: I've noticed that the side effects of pregnancy are greatly amplified... With the dosage of Expectane that l've required. The morning sickness, the mood swings. Sleepiness, sexual appetite.
- Dr. Larry Arbogast: Sexual appetite?
- Dr. Alex Hesse: Yesterday, just scooping the middle out of a honeydew melon gave me a... a "Steifen".
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Dr. Alex Hesse
Danny DeVito - Dr. Larry Arbogast