Pregnancy quotes

“- New Mother: Is it a boy or a girl?
- Obstretrician: Now I think it's a bit early to start imposing roles on it, don't you?”
Graham Arthur Chapman - Obstretrician

“- Cleo Miller: The baby's got two heads!
- Lucy Whitman: It's twins!
- Diane Weston: I'm not just super fat!”
Melissa George - Cleo Miller
Sara Marsh - Lucy Whitman
Marley Shelton - Diane Weston

“- Stan Bobrucz: Why don't we just keep it.
- Mr. Bobrucz: Grow up! You had a gerbil last year, you forgot to feed it, it died. This baby is going up for adoption, period.
- Donna Elliot: No. Darcy is not going to lug this baby around for nine months and get stretch marks so you could give it up to Catholic charities.”
Randall Batinkoff - Stan Bobrucz
Kenneth Mars - Mr. Bobrucz
Miriam Flynn - Donna Elliot

“- Wendon: I'm afraid I have some bad news... well maybe its not that bad. The princess is pregnant.
- Jason: Pregnant? How the hell did that happen?
- Wendon: Well you can be sure I had nothing to do with it. She's asking to see you.”
Bruce Vilanch - Wendon
Robert Urich - Jason

“- Audrey Timmonds: Wait, I don't get it... If he's the first of his kind, how can he be pregnant? Doesn't he need a mate?
- Dr. Niko Tatopoulus: Not if he reproduces asexually.
- Audrey Timmonds: Where's the fun in that?”
Maria Pitillo - Audrey Timmonds
Matthew Broderick - Dr. Niko Tatopoulos

“They said I lost the baby. Lost it. Like it was my keys or something.”
Taryn Manning - Mimi

“Isn't it more thrilling to give life than take it away?”

Nancy Kelly - Sarah Allen

“I should have had a vasectomy at birth! Let me tell you something Al, you ever have boys, do them a favor and get them neutered straight away. If they ever knock up some little slut, they're the ones who're fucked!
[to his wife]
Fucked for life! I hate you, you little bitch!”
Rob Lowe - Billy Hicks

“- Rebecca Taylor: Sam! My water broke!
- Samuel Faulkner: Well, we'll get you another one!”
Julianne Moore - Rebecca Taylor
Hugh Grant - Samuel Faulkner

“Hey, let's have five. Let's have six. Let's have a dozen and pretend they're donuts!”

Steve Martin - Gil

“- Samantha Taylor: That looks bad, have you taken anything for it?
- George Webber: Yes, I took four of your birth control pills, I hope that's okay.
- Samantha Taylor: Try an antihistimine.
- George Webber: I don't like those, they make me pregnant.”

Julie Andrews - Samantha Taylor
Dudley Moore - George Webber

“- James: Whoa! You really got your figure back, didn't you?
- Mollie: This is not my figure!
- James: Well then, you got Dolly Parton's figure back!”

John Travolta - James
Kirstie Alley - Mollie

“A developing fetus goes through certain distinct phases. Each phase represents a specific stage of evolution. A human fetus, for instance. At one stage, it's a fish. It looks like a fish; it's got fins and gills. At another, it's amphibian - webbed hands; at another, reptilian; at another, it's feline - developing upward in the distinct shapes...” (continue)(continue reading)
Robert Foxworth - Rob

“- Francis MacMillan: Did your husband leave you when you got pregnant?
- Claudia Draper: No, I had an abortion.
- Francis MacMillan: Why?
- Claudia Draper: I don't believe in childhood.”
Robert Webber - Francis MacMillan
Barbra Streisand - Claudia Draper

“- Cruella De Vil: Be sure to let me know when the blessed event occurs.
- Anita: It won't be for another 8 months.
- Cruella De Vil: The puppies, darling. I have no use for babies.”

Glenn Close - Cruella De Vil
Joely Richardson - Anita

“- Denny: In my family, a man has only to look at a woman and she's pregnant.
- Rita: That's because you're all so cockeyed.”
Malcolm Douglas - Denny
Julie Walters - Rita

“- Dr. Carter: Are you pregnant?
- Regina Belmont: No. Thought I was once.
- Dr. Carter: That's not important.
- Regina Belmont: Longest three weeks of my life”
Geoffrey Lewis - Dr. Carter
Catherine Mary Stewart - Regina Belmont

“I gave birth to a nine-pound baby, asshole. I think I can handle it.”

Meg Ryan - Karen Walden

“He's a wonderful guy and a terrific doctor. Never lost a patient. Got a couple of them pregnant, but never lost one.”

Woody Allen - Andrew

“- Dexter King: How was your day?
- Kate: Not great. A nurses's day is always pretty grisly. A woman I was with gave birth to a baby in a lift.
- Dexter King: Well, that was okay, er?
- Kate: It would have been, but her husband slipped on the afterbirth and broke his collarbone.”
Jeff Goldblum - Dexter King
Emma Thompson - Kate

“- Vann: I never did that before. I put that vacuum away. When everything went black.
- Jane: It can happen. I fainted once.
- Vann: You did?
- Jane: When I was pregnant.
- Vann: I hope I'm not pregnant, Mrs. Durwin.”
Owen Wilson - Vann
Mercedes Ruehl - Jane

“- Samuel Faulkner: Are you sure?
- Rebecca Taylor: I'm ten days late.
- Samuel Faulkner: And there's no way you could have had it and just not noticed?”
Hugh Grant - Samuel Faulkner
Julianne Moore - Rebecca Taylor

“- Dr. Diana Reddin: Do you have your own room?
- Dr. Alex Hesse: Yes. Why?
- Dr. Diana Reddin: Well, call me old-fashioned, but I'll be damned if I'm having a child with a man I've never even slept with.”
Emma Thompson - Dr. Diana Reddin
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Dr. Alex Hesse

“- Doctor: It was smart of you to tell him you were pregnant.
- Debbie: Yeah, most men run when they hear that.”
Joe Inscoe - Doctor

“- Trish Murtaugh: Where's Lorna?
- Martin Riggs: She's okay. I think she's on her third breakfast now.
- Trish Murtaugh: I remember those days.”
Darlene Love - Trish Murtaugh
Mel Gibson - Martin Riggs