Sarcasm quotes

“- India Stoker: You look like my father.
- Charles Stoker: I am so sorry.
- India Stoker: It's your loss, too.”
Mia Wasikowska - India Stoker
Matthew Goode - Charles Stoker

“- Colin: Why don't you come work for me? You're young. You should be with a winner.
- Nate: I prefer to work somewhere with a little bit of legacy.
- Colin: Nothing lasts forever.
- [Both laugh]
- Nate: [staring up at Colin's bald head] Clearly.”
Colin Mochrie - Colin Frost
Portia Doubleday - Nate

“Oh, I'm a loser? Says the guy with drug dealer friends and no car.”
Wes Bentley - James

“Please excuse my father. It makes him feel young and powerful to treat us like idiot children.”
Aidan Quinn - Alfred Ludlow

“- Joy: Oh, come on! It could be worse...
- Disgust: Yeah Joy, we could be lying on the dirty floor in a bag.”

Amy Poehler - Joy
Mindy Kaling - Disgust

“Sarcasm is a metric for potential.”
John Slattery - Howard Stark

“- John Connolly: He was very good to me when I was little, Marianne, that's all you need to know.
- Marianne Connolly: [sarcastically] How was he good to you, John? Did he take you trick-or-treating?”

Joel Edgerton - John Connolly
Julianne Nicholson - Marianne Connolly

“You're a loud kisser, and it's gross and unappealing. You look like some old toothless woman suckin' the jelly out of a donut.”

Melissa McCarthy - Susan Cooper

“I can see your gun, unless you're so extreme that you have a second dick coming out of your hip!”
Melissa McCarthy - Susan Cooper

“- Bob Rueland: Would you go out with me?
- Grace Briggs: Yes?
- Bob Rueland: Is that a question?
- Grace Briggs: No, it's a yes. Yes.
- Bob Rueland: Tomorrow night?
- Grace Briggs: Yes.
- Bob Rueland: Eight o'clock?
- Grace Briggs: Yes.
- Bob Rueland: Pick you up here?
- Grace Briggs: Yes.
- Bob Rueland: My, you're a very difficult woman.”
David Duchovny - Bob Rueland
Minnie Driver - Grace Briggs

- Casey: What am I supposed to do? Write a piece called "We're all fucked"?
- Charlie Geller: Yes! That's a perfect title!
Lyle Brocato - Casey
John Magaro - Charlie Geller

“God must have some kind of plan to teach me some kind of lesson. I just can't figure out what it is.”
Forest Whitaker - Thick Willis

“I'm sorry Gerry.”

Susan McPhail - Donna

“This is not some cute tech like the Iron Man suit!”

Michael Douglas - Dr. Hank Pym

“You cling to your pathetic life, those closest to you betray you and those you claim to protect don't even know your name.”
Julie Engelbrecht - The Witch Queen

“My apologies. I was worried you were having a party, but I see now you really are having a wake.”

“- Victoria Lasseter: You were made a temporary supervisor because you kissed the right asses.
- Adrian Yates: Because I'm the right man for the job.
- Victoria Lasseter: According to who? Daffy Duck?”
Connie Britton - Victoria Lasseter
Christopher Grace - Adrian Yates

“- Kate: What would you do if you were in my shoes?
- Bella: Get new shoes.”
Portia Doubleday - Kate Kassell
Mimi Kuzyk - Bella Shapiro

“- Susan: How bad will it get?
- West: Am I the only one who knows about zombies here?”

Carrie Genzel - Susan
Rob Riggle - Frank West

“- Erich Van Wyck: Is that it?
- Burt Gummer: Sure as hell ain't Mickey Mouse.”

Daniel Janks - Erich Van Wyck
Michael Gross - Burt Gummer

“Wow. You know... What has to happen in a person's life to become a critic anyway?”
Michael Keaton - Riggan

- Richie Lanz: Thanks for not killing me.
- Tariq: [answers in Pashtun]
- Richie Lanz: What did he say?
- Riza: "The day is not over yet".
Bill Murray - Richie Lanz
Fahim Fazli - Tariq
Arian Moayed - Riza

“- Eric Murphy: We can't finish the movie without money.
- Ari Gold: Really? Because I thought we could finish it with Fruit Loops.
- Eric Murphy: You're funny.”
Kevin Connolly - Eric
Jeremy Piven - Ari Gold

“- Kate Ellis: The young you still lives inside you!
- Maura Ellis: Just like shingles ya'll!”
Tina Fey - Kate Ellis
Amy Poehler - Maura Ellis

“You're right, it's a classic kidnapping. They took our children and the canned goods and pasta.”
Nick Offerman - Frank