School quotes

“Rise up in the cafeteria and stab them with your plastic forks.”
Christian Slater - Mark Hunter

“- Miss Anna Mongomery: I think Juan would want you to do well in school and in soccer.
- Kate Douglas: He wouldn't want me to do well. He'd want me to win.”
Olivia d'Abo - Miss Anna Montgomery
Jessica Robertson - Kate Douglas

“This is an institution of learning, ladies and gentlemen. If you can't control it, how can you teach?”

Morgan Freeman - Principal Joe Clark

“You know, there's going to be sex, drugs, rock-n-roll... chips, dips, chains, whips... You know, your basic high school orgy type of thing. I mean, uh, I'm not talking candlewax on the nipples, or witchcraft or anything like that, no, no, no. Just a couple of hundred kids running around in their underwear, acting like complete animals.”
Kelly LeBrock - Lisa

“- Drew Boreman: Patty and I have a little business to attend to. The term papers are in, Eisenhower, Johnson, Kennedy...
- Patty: Kennedy! Oh, he was so cute! How much?
- Drew Boreman: A date with me.
- Patty: I'll take Johnson.”
Jonathan Silverman - Drew Boreman
Charene Cathleen - Patty

“- Josie Hemphill: You could go to school over there at Sul Ross. Still live here. You could talk to daddy about that.
- John Hemphill: We talked about college a few years ago. He told me all a father owes his son is room and board for 18 years. And after that, he's on his own.”
Ashley Johnson - Josie Hemphill
Eddie Mills - John Hemphill

“- Billy Madison: I swear to God I'm sick. I can't go to school.
- Juanita: If you're gonna stay home today, you can help me shave my armpits.
- Billy Madison: Oh my God. I'll go to school.”
Adam Sandler - Billy Madison
Theresa Merritt - Juanita

“- School Bus Driver: Are you coming along?
- Young Forrest: Mama said not to be taking rides from strangers.
- School Bus Driver: This is the bus to school.”
Siobhan Fallon - School Bus Driver
Michael Conner Humphreys - Young Forrest

“- Mary Anne Spier: Something's wrong here, you guys. School's out and I miss it.
- Dawn Schafer: I know, it's not that I love it, just...
- Mary Anne Spier: We don't get to see each other everyday?
- Jessi Ramsey: And we end up baby-sitting at different houses.
- Mallory Pike: We might as well be on seperate planets.”
Rachael Leigh Cook - Mary Anne Spier
Larisa Oleynik - Dawn Schafer
Zelda Harris - Jessi Ramsey
Stacy Linn Ramsower - Mallory Pike

- Zeus Carver: It's ten after nine. Why aren't you in school?
- Raymond: Tony wants to sell you this.
- Zeus Carver: Tony? That no-neck dude they call "Bad T"?
- Dexter: He says he found it in a dumpster.
- Zeus Carver: He keeps stealing from people, they're gonna find him in a dumpster.
Samuel L. Jackson - Zeus Carver
Aldis Hodge - Raymond
Michael Alexander Jackson - Dexter

“- Tommy: Did you hear I finally graduated?
- Richard: Yeah, and just a shade under a decade too. All right.
- Tommy: You know a lot of people go to college for seven years.
- Richard: I know, they're called doctors.”
Chris Farley - Tommy
David Spade - Richard

“- Sergeant Neff: Mathematics, good. Science, very good. Military history, fair, room for improvement.
- Damien Thorn: Yes, Sergeant.
- Sergeant Neff: Physical training is excellent. I hear you're quite a football player. Be proud of your accomplishments. Pride is all right when there's reason to be proud.
- Damien Thorn: Yes, Sergeant.”
Lance Henriksen - Sergeant Neff
Jonathan Scott-Taylor - Damien Thorn

“My first grade teacher, Miss Nimvel, told Dede that I never paid attention. That I was probably retarded, and that I had a very limited future as a citizen of the United States. Then a week later, she said I should probably skip second grade, maybe even skip elementary school altogether.”
Adam Hann-Byrd - Fred Tate

“In two years I have been to nine different schools, eaten in nine cafeterias. I can't even remember anyone's name.”
Christina Ricci - Kathleen 'Kat' Harvey

“- Walt: Daddy what's gradual school?
- Garp: What?
- Walt: Gradual school. Mommy say's she teaches at gradual school.
- Garp: Gradual school is where you go to school and you gradually find out you don't want to go to school anymore.”
Ian MacGregor - Walt
Robin Williams - Garp

Oh! The theme I've been waiting for all my life. Listen to this sentence: "a Red Ryder BB gun with a compass in the stock, and this thing which tells time". Poetry. Sheer poetry, Ralph! An A+!

Tedde Moore - Miss Shields

- Julie "The Cat" Gaffney: I want to know who this new Coach Orion is. My dad said that if I didn't like him, I could come right home.
- Russ Tyler: That's nice. My dad said I better stay in on scholarship or he'll whip my butt.
Colombe Jacobsen-Derstine - Julie "The Cat" Gaffney
Kenan Thompson - Russ Tyler

“- Albert Rosenfeld: Tell me some other things about her.
- Special Agent Dale Cooper: She's in high school. She is sexually active. She is using drugs. She's crying out for help.
- Albert Rosenfeld: Well damn, Cooper, that really narrows it down. You're talking about half the high school girls in America!”

Miguel Ferrer - Albert Rosenfeld
Kyle MacLachlan - Special Agent Dale Cooper

“- Dean Vernon Wormer: Have you boys seen your grade point averages yet? Well, have you?
- Robert Hoover: I have, sir. I know it's a little below par...
- Dean Vernon Wormer: It's more than a little below par, Mr. Hoover. It stinks! It's the lowest on campus. It's the lowest in Faber history!”
John Vernon - Dean Vernon Wormer
James Widdoes - Robert Hoover

“I would just like to say that physical education in this school is a disgrace. I mean, standing in line for forty minutes is hardly aerobically effective. I doubt I've worked off the calories in a stick of Carefree gum.”
Alicia Silverstone - Cher

“- Mrs. Murphy: What did you learn in school today?
- Dade: Revenge.”
Alberta Watson - Lauren Murphy
Jonny Lee Miller - Dade

“- Kate Rambeau: She's my friend.
- Miss Evelyn Togar: A friend that will lead you down the road to expulsion.
- Riff Randell: I'm a teenage lobotomy.”
Dey Young - Kate Rambeau
Mary Woronov - Miss Evelyn Togar
P.J. Soles - Riff Randell