Sex quotes

- Lucia DeLury: I mean, "I don't understand sex". I don't get it. Get it? It seems like a lot of trouble for not much. Am I the only one that thinks this?
- Bill Truitt: I don't think you're the tip of an iceberg, frankly.
- Lucia DeLury: I would rather have a backrub, you know. It lasts longer and there's no fluids. You know, what's so great... (continue)(continue reading)
Lisa Kudrow - Lucia DeLury
Martin Donovan - Bill Truitt

“She did not marry your penis. Ok, she didn't only marry your penis.”

Jami Gertz - Dr. Melissa Reeves

“For me, love is very deep, sex only has to go a few inches.”
Stacey Nelkin - Rita

“- John Spartan: Look, Huxley, why don't we just do it the old-fashioned way?
- Lenina Huxley: [stands up, shocked] Ew, disgusting! You mean... fluid transfer?”

Sylvester Stallone - John Spartan
Sandra Bullock - Lenina Huxley

“What is it about good sex that makes me have to crap? You really jarred something loose tiger.”
Lin Shaye - Landlady

“- Tristan: Samuel, God bless you. You are good at everything you try to do. I'm sure it'll be the same with fucking.
- Samuel: Tristan, really. We're talking about my future wife.
- Tristan: Oh, you're not gonna fuck her?
- Samuel: No!
- Tristan: No?
- Samuel: No! I'm planning to be with her.
- Tristan: I recommend fucking.”
Brad Pitt - Tristan Ludlow
Henry Thomas - Samuel Ludlow

“Listen up limp dick as for you pitiful knowledge of what a real women wants. I’m not going to waste my time on some loser who doesn’t even know what snowblowing is. It has to be said my new boyfriend he's in high school and every time we talk about you he laughs his ass off about you.”
Jena Malone - Anna Harrison

“There's only two things to do on rainy days, and I don't like to play cards.”
Frances Faye - Nell

“Think about it Josh, you're in college. The window of opportunity to drink and do drugs and take advantage of young girls is getting smaller by the day.”
Seann William Scott - E. L.

“- Bud Macintosh: Russel! How'd you get a job?
- Russell: Fucking President Clinton.
- Doyle Johnson: You had sex with President Clinton?”
Pauly Shore - Bud Macintosh
Taylor Negron - Russell
Stephen Baldwin - Doyle Johnson

- Kisha: Not only she knows you but she said she sucked your little black "dingaling" last night! So what you got to say now, huh?
- Tommy 'Buns' Bundy: Bitch is lyin'!
Taral Hicks - Kisha
DMX - Tommy 'Buns' Bundy

“- Rita: Is there a girl you're seein'?
- Robert 'Bobby' Boucher Jr.: Seein'? Uh, I see a lot of girls... I see a lot of guys too.
- Rita: I think that's sexy, you ever been with a guy and girl at the same time?
- Robert 'Bobby' Boucher Jr.: Oh yea, plenty of times. The other night, I was with my Mama and Coach Klein at the same time.”
Jennifer Taylor - Rita
Adam Sandler - Robert 'Bobby' Boucher Jr.

“So, because I'm a beautiful woman, the only reason any man wants to talk to me is because he wants to fuck me?”

Nicole Kidman - Alice Harford

“It's you who I want to step to my scene, ‘cause rather the deal with the fallacy... of this dry-ass reality... I'd rather dance and romance your sweet ass in a wet dream. Who am I? Well, they call me Brother to the night. And right now I'm the blues in your left thigh... trying to become the funk in your right. Is that all right?”
Larenz Tate - Darius Lovehall

“I can't have sex with you! My body belongs to my husband and there is no way that I could betray him in that way. But what I do from the neck up is a different story.”
Melanie Griffith - Nicole Oliver

“- Freshman Girl: Will you marry me?
- Don Dawson: I don't know. What's in it for me?
- Freshman Girl: Anything you want?
- Don Dawson: Anything?
- Freshman Girl: Anything.
- Don Dawson: [opening his mouth wide] Go like this. Do you spit or swallow?
- Freshman Girl: Whatever you like.
- Don Dawson: Whatever I like? I would definitely marry you.”
Sasha Jenson - Don Dawson

“I've only slept with the men I've been married to. How many women can make that claim?”
Liz Taylor

“He gives her class and she gives him sex.”

Katharine Hepburn On Fred Astaire

“Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.”
Billy Crystal

“Did you get fucked? Because Tommy's made a living out of fucking his partners.”

Robert Pastorelli - Det. Jimmy Detillo

“Having sex with her was like reading the Wall St. Journal.”

Charlie Sheen - Bud Fox

“- Poindexter: Wait, would you rather live in the ascendancy of a civilization or during its decline?
- Mu: Poindexter, do you wanna fuck, or not?
- Poindexter: Okay.”
Timothy Busfield - Poindexter
Linda Felker - Mu

- "Booger": Big deal! Did you get in her pants?
- Gilbert: She's not that kind of girl, Booger.
- "Booger": Why? Does she have a penis?

Curtis Armstrong - "Booger"
Anthony Edwards - Gilbert

“You've got to lick it, before you kick it! You've got to make it soft and wet before you stick it!”

Art Malik - Akmed
Scott LaRose - Singh

“My angel, flung out of space...”

Cate Blanchett - Carol Aird