Sex quotes

“Roberta can't be a prostitute she doesn't even like sex that much. It's impossible.”

Mark Blum - Gary Glass

“- Doris: Wanna fuck?
- George Peters: What?
- Doris: You didn't understand the question?”

Ellen Burstyn - Doris
Alan Alda - George Peters

“It didn't seem like you came! I mean, usually a guy'll moan or something, you didn't even clear your throat!”
Kate Nelligan - Cora

“- Cesar Dominguez: I thought we were not supposed to get laid for a couple of weeks before a fight.
- Vince Boudreau: Says who?
- Cesar Dominguez: Everybody knows that. You know, it's an energy thing...
- Vince Boudreau: All the great ones got laid before they fought! I mean, the more the better, man.”
Antonio Banderas - Cesar Dominguez
Woody Harrelson - Vince Boudreau

“I just had to tie my wife down to the bed. I've never done anything like that before, well except for that one time when the kids were at camp.”
Thom Sharp - Braydon Aglet

“- Romy White: You have absolutely no proof that you're cuter.
- Michele Weinberger: Oh, proof. You want proof? Ok, fine. Who lost their virginity first?
- Romy White: Oh, big wow, with your cousin Barry. I wouldn't brag about it.”
Mira Sorvino - Romy White
Lisa Kudrow - Michele Weinberger

“I was born by the pussy, I'll die by the pussy.”
Chris Tucker - Skip

“Whistling condoms. They come in seven tunes, and so can you.”
Michael Richards - Lacrobat

“- Andrea: Todd and I have been seeing each other.
- Kevin: Todd doesn't see girls. He fucks them.
- Andrea: You know, that is so rude. You don't even know him. Todd and I have something very special.”
Dominique Swain - Andrea Marr
Channon Roe - Kevin

“If we fucked, you would love it.”
Leo Fitzpatrick - Telly

“- Sam: There are all these words for a woman who doesn't want to have sex: frigid, uptight, cold, icy. But can you even think of one word for a man that doesn't want to have sex?
- Danny: ...Dead?”
Emily Hamilton - Sam
Noah Taylor - Danny

“I'll never forget you, Hermione. You was the first woman I didn't have to pay for.”
Jack Nicholson - Henry Lloyd Moon

“Last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty.”
Woody Allen - Cliff Stern

“- Gynecologist: Are you sexually active?
- Gwyn: Oh no!... I mean, of course I am, but, you know, just not... not currently. I'd say that... I'd say, I'm experiencing a dry spell
- Gynecologist: So you're married?”
Lisa Banes - Gynecologist
Sarah Jessica Parker - Gwyn

“- Louis: [Louis and Sabrina are kissing] I'm in Paris but you are somewhere else.
- Sabrina Fairchild: I'm sorry, Louis... I shouldn't have done this.
- Louis: I would like to help. But what you have to fix, you won't fix it in bed. You have to fix it here.”

Patrick Bruel - Louis
Julia Ormond - Sabrina Fairchild

“If you ever want to sleep at night, don't marry a beautiful girl.”
Billy Bob Thornton - Russell Bell

“Screw the Oscars. Screw the Academy Awards. Screw me, Sidney. Please. Please.”
Maggie Smith - Diana Barrie

“He's weird, he's strange, he's sloppy, he's a total nightmare for women... I can't believe I haven't slept with him yet.”
Janeane Garofalo - Vickie Miner

“I just made myself a little promise: no more endin' up naked with some girl I don't even know what her name is.”
Viggo Mortensen - Eddie Boone

“- Sonny Burns: I would like to... go to... bed with you.
- Gale Ann Thayer: To... take a nap?
- Sonny Burns: To have sexual intercourse.”
Jeremy Davies - Sonny Burns
Rose McGowan - Gale Ann Thayer

- Glen: What am I talkin' about? I'm talkin' about sex, boy, what the hell you talkin' about? I'm talkin' about l'amour! I'm talkin' that me and Dot are swingers, as in "to swing". I'm talkin' about wife swappin'. I'm talkin' about what they call nowadays open marriage. I'm talk...
- H.I. McDunnough: [knocks Glen to the ground with a punch] Keep... (continue)(continue reading)
Sam McMurray - Glen
Nicolas Cage - H.I. McDunnough

“People need people, Steve. It has nothing to do with sex. Ok, maybe 40 percent. 60 percent. Forget it.”
Bridget Fonda - Janet Livermore

“- Mr. Pink: But this tipping automatically, it's for the birds. As far as I'm concerned, they're just doing their job.
- Mr. Blue: Hey, our girl was nice.
- Mr. Pink: She was okay. She wasn't anything special.
- Mr. Blue: What's special? Take you in the back and suck your dick?
- Nice Guy Eddie: I'd go over twelve percent for that.”

Steve Buscemi - Mr. Pink
Edward Bunker - Mr. Blue
Chris Penn - Nice Guy Eddie

“- Officer Richard Lymangood: All those people. What do you suppose they're all doing down there?
- Officer Frank Murphy: Well, according to the latest statistics, about 1 million, 775 thousand of them are... getting it on!
- Officer Richard Lymangood: That many, eh!
- Officer Frank Murphy: The rest are waiting for 'Laverne and Shirley'!”

Daniel Stern - Officer Richard Lymangood
Roy Scheider - Officer Frank Murphy

“Why don't you just tie a mattress to your back? You don't care where it is, do you?”

Michael Beck - Swan