Sex quotes

“- Pete Curtis: What do you do for sex?
- Guy Hamilton: You're worried about that?
- Pete Curtis: Whenever I hit the front page, I get a hard-on. So what do you do? I go up to the cemetery.
- Guy Hamilton: Are you a necrophiliac?
- Billy Kwan: It's where the prostitutes hang out.”
Michael Murphy - Pete Curtis
Mel Gibson - Guy Hamilton
Linda Hunt - Billy Kwan

“I don't blame you. When I was your age, I was knocking them off left and right; but I never did it with nobody's daughter. You should have given her an ankle bracelet and stuck to jerking off!”

Dolph Sweet - Chubby Galasso

“- Veronica Loughran: You men make me feel sick. You'll sleep with anything that says yes.
- Dante Hicks: Animal, mineral or vegetable.
- Veronica Loughran: Vegetable, meaning paraplegic.
- Dante Hicks: They put up the least amount of struggle.”
Marilyn Ghigliotti - Veronica
Brian O'Halloran - Dante Hicks

“I thought that going to bed could mean a little more than thrashing around all night in wild ecstasy. I thought it could mean cuddling and toasty warmth, sharing one's innermost needs and fears. That's what getting naked truly means to me. That's what sex truly is. I'm sorry. It is too bad. I guess you don't ever want to get totally naked with me.”

Lolita Davidovich - Blaze Starr

“Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair. We've traveled a hundred miles 'cause we thought we were gonna score. But now it's not gonna happen. Damn it!”

Mike Judge - Beavis

- Jonah: What was I supposed to say? "Yes, Walter, I am sort of fucking your wife"?
- Lonnie Fox: Is that what we're doing, sort of fucking?
Paul Simon - Jonah
Joan Hackett - Lonnie Fox

“- Franklin Hatchett: James had a lot of women. Actually, he had all the women.
- James Russell: All the women, all the guys, I fucked them all!”
Chris Tucker - Franklin Hatchett
Charlie Sheen - James Russell

“- Betsy: He says that I had three orgasms, that I begged him for mercy, and that I've never seen a man so well endowed.
- Christine Ramsey: Well, is he?
- Betsy: Is he what?
- Christine Ramsey: Is he well endowed?
- Betsy: I don't really know. I mean not first hand. Just from what Bubba tells me.”
Kathleen Wilhoite - Betsy
Phoebe Cates - Christine

“Humpin' and pumpin' is not Sheldon's strong suit. It's the name. 'Do it to me Sheldon, you're an animal Sheldon, ride me big Shel-don'. Doesn't work.”
Billy Crystal - Harry Burns

“- Christine Ramsey: Bets, have you ever really done it, all the way?
- Betsy: Well, yes and no.
- Christine Ramsey: What do you mean yes and no? Don't you know?
- Betsy: Bubba says we did it once and it was very good for both of us, but I was passed out I don't remember a thing.”
Phoebe Cates - Christine
Kathleen Wilhoite - Betsy

“- Lily: Do you drink coffee?
- Jim: No, not really.
- Lily: Because I thought maybe we could go back to my apartment for some coffee or something.
- Jim: I would love some coffee.”
Karin Anger - Lily
Robert May - Jim

The emcee asks, "What's the most romantic place you've ever made love to your wife?". And this guy's thinking, he's got a brain like a pea, but he's thinking, and he says, "In the butt!".
Michael Rooker - Terry

“- Matuzak: Damn it, Ricky, I catch you fucking this machine again, I'll break your neck.
- Ricky: Sorry, chief.
- Walker: Looks like safe sex to me.”

Bruce McGill - Matuzak
Scott Bellis - Ricky
Jean-Claude Van Damme - Walker

“- Rebecca Taylor: I don't think we should make love until we talk to the doctor.
- Samuel Faulkner: Please?
- Rebecca Taylor: We don't know what could happen, hon. But you know what? I bet if we wait a while, we can feel the baby move again.
- Samuel Faulkner: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That would be just as much fun.”

Julianne Moore - Rebecca Taylor
Hugh Grant - Samuel Faulkner

“- Maguire: What is she like between the sheets?
- Fergus: Definitely unusual.”

Adrian Dunbar - Maguire
Stephen Rea - Fergus

“Hollywood, California. Home to the rich and powerful. Yet so popular with the broken and destitute. Here sex hunger is reflected in every aspect of daily life, and instant gratification is tirelessly pursued. A center of casual violence and capricious harassment. Where rampant vice and amorality permeate every strata of society... It is a known...” (continue)(continue reading)

“Too fucking busy, or too busy fucking?”
Jim True-Frost - Mike Anderson

“- Alley Thug: You're real cool for somebody who's about to take a bullet.
- Joe Hallenbeck: After fucking your wife I'll take two.”
Badja Djola - Alley Thug
Bruce Willis - Joe Hallenbeck

“- Carola: Preston and I are celebrating the tenth anniversary of the night we first met.
- Margaret: You mean when you thought he was gonna push you up against the wall and rape you?
- Carola: Yes, darling.”
Rae Dawn Chong - Carola
Nicolle Rochelle - Margaret

“- Ben Dover: Take your pants off.
- Irwin 'Fletch' Fletcher: I don't even know your name.
- Ben Dover: Bend over.
- Irwin 'Fletch' Fletcher: Ben? Nice to meet you, Victor Hugo.”
Randall 'Tex' Cobb - Ben Dover
Chevy Chase - Irwin 'Fletch' Fletcher

“Cookie, you're a definite artist. They should put your lips in the Smithsonian.”

Woody Allen - Harry Block

“- Mare Spofford: That fella poet is raping all the women in Woodsmoke?
- Frank Spofford: Yeah, you'll have to wait your turn, Mare.”
Lois Smith - Mare Spofford
Roberts Blossom - Frank Spofford

“Hi. I'm Russ, and I'm a Sagittarius. I enjoy surfing, candlelit dinners, and Tolstoi. Listen: I'm a mature person and you're a mature person, so why don't we just skip all the bullshit, get rid of our inhibitions, and do what we really wanna do?”
Skip Lackey - Russ

“- Melissa: You wanna fuck?
- Doug: What?
- Melissa: Fuck. I can demonstrate, if you like.
- Doug: I already told you, I have a girlfriend.
- Melissa: I don't know. Your mouth says that, but your body is saying something different.”

Molly Ringwald - Melissa Nelson
Patrick McGaw - Doug Gordon

“- Skylar: What if I said I wouldn't have sex with you again until I got to meet your friends. What would you say?
- Will Hunting: I'd say it's 4:30 in the morning. They're probably up.”
Minnie Driver - Skylar
Matt Damon - Will Hunting