Son quotes

“- Richard Dice: Don't you see, mom, I've cracked the case!
- Mrs. Evelyn Dice: You're just plain cracked, Richard!”
Rob Lowe - Richard Dice
Jessica James - Mrs. Evelyn Dice

“- Carol Connelly: You're going to die soon with that diet. You know that, right?
- Melvin Udall: Oh, we're all going to die soon. I will, you will, and it sure sounds like your son will.
- Carol Connelly: If you ever mention my son again, you will not be able to eat here any more, Mr Udall. Do you understand me? Give me some sign you understand...” (continue)(continue reading)
Julie Benz - Carol Connelly
Jack Nicholson - Melvin Udall

“I didn't have any problems with my dad. Maybe it's 'cause Mom ate his head before I was born.”
Seth Rogen - Mantis

“- H.M. Tilford: We'll make you a millionaire while you're sitting here from one minute to the next.
- Plainview: What else would I do with myself?
- H.M. Tilford: Take care of your son. I don't know what you would do.”
David Warshofsky - H.M. Tilford
Daniel Day-Lewis - Daniel Plainview

“I have a telegram for a Dr. Loveless. It's from his mother, Irene. She's telling him to come on home, stop all this foolishness.”
Will Smith - James West

“- Sue: We were good parents and now we're supposed to be done!
- Male BBQ Guest #1: Hey, I don't blame my kid for stayin'. Our place is much nicer than anything he can afford.
- Male BBQ Guest #2: Well, our son's a flight attendant. He travels so much, it doesn't make any sense to have his own apartment.
- Female BBQ Guest: Plus, he has a lot of...” (continue)(continue reading)
Kathy Bates - Sue
E.L. James - Male BBQ Guest #1
Stewart Skelton - Male BBQ Guest #2
Sarah Lilly - Female BBQ Guest

- Calvin "Cal" Jarrett: He just wants to know that you don't hate him.
- Beth Jarrett: Hate him! How could I hate him? Mothers don't hate their sons!

Donald Sutherland - Calvin
Mary Tyler Moore - Beth

“I bet there's not a single night where you can close your eyes tight enough without seeing my little boy's face. I'm gonna give you a chance to know your son. If you live today, you'll get to know your son. And if you don't, I'll raise him as my own.”

Mickey Rourke - Stavros

“A king, realizing his incompetence, can either delegate or
abdicate his duties. A father can do neither. If only sons 
could see the paradox, they would understand the dilemma.”
Marlene Dietrich

“Do you know the story of the princess whose beloved prince dies in battle? The enemy prince, after overrunning the castle, finds the princess and forces himself upon her. Months later the princess is with child... But whose? It's either the child of her enemy, the man that killed her husband, the man that raped her... In which case she will kill...” (continue)(continue reading)
Charlize Theron - Jillian Armacost

“A baby holds your hands, and then suddenly, there's this huge man lifting you off the ground, and then he's gone. Where's that son?”
Himself - Andre Gregory

“- Dan: We made a deal, remember? We made a deal we'd always be honest with one another.
- Alex: Dad, I was like five years old when we made that deal.
- Dan: Yeah, I liked you better then.”
Dennis Quaid - Dan
Scarlett Johansson - Alex

“You gotta be ready to listen to your children, even if they have nothing to say.”
Garry Marshall - Buck Cluck

“Take away a man's son, you've truly given him nothing left to lose.”

Jesse Eisenberg - Columbus

“- Jeff: Why did you have him? You knew he would have the same disease as you.
- Selma: I just wanted to hold a little baby.”

Peter Stormare - Jeff
Björk - Selma Jezkova

“- Lionel: Don't worry your majesties he'll meet someone tonight. I can feel it in my bones.
- Queen Constantina: You'll feel it in your bones if he doesn't.”
Jason Alexander - Lionel
Whoopi Goldberg - Queen Constantina

“- Silvio: Believe us, sir. Your son is not what they told you.
- Ed Horman: How do you know that, Silvio?
- Silvio: He's a nice guy. He's sincere. A hard worker. But he's a political neophyte. He's terrified of violence.”
Alex Camacho - Silvio
Jack Lemmon - Ed Horman

“- Charles Randolph: All the hoping... you must think me a fool.
- Ram Dass: Is it your wish to be wise, sahib?
- Charles Randolph: I don't know. I suppose a wise man wouldn't have come here at all.”

Arthur Malet - Charles Randolph
Errol Sitahal - Ram Dass

“My son was to stand at my side and sing tonight – but now I have no son.”

Warner Oland - The Cantor

“Dad, you were like a father to me.”

Zach Galifianakis - Ethan Tremblay

“- Jimmy Chan: Pop, tell these guys I'm not crazy!
- Charlie Chan: Parent must first convince self of same.”
Victor Sen Yung - Jimmy Chan
Sidney Toler - Charlie Chan

“- Ed Horman: He, he seems so innocent. Almost deliberately naive.
- Beth Horman: Is that so bad?
- Ed Horman: Is that so good?
- Beth Horman: You raised him.”
Jack Lemmon - Ed Horman
Sissy Spacek - Beth Horman

“My second son weighed 300 pounds. Died in the arms of a whore in Paso Robles, California. My other son, lost all track of him. My two ex-wives won't speak to me, and my daughter, you know goddamn well won't speak to me, and Ty Cobb can't get it up anymore. Print it all!”
Tommy Lee Jones - Ty Cobb

- Edna: You look just like my son-in-law.
- Peter McGowan: I am your son-in-law, Edna.
- Edna: My son-in-law's name is Peter.
- Peter McGowan: No. I said your name was Edna. My name is Peter.
- Edna: You just said your name was Edna... Edna's a funny name for a man. Been teased over the years?
- Peter McGowan: Mercilessly. "Pete".
Lynn Redgrave - Edna
Sir Kenneth Branagh - Peter McGowan

“- Lloyd: In the ninth grade we said he could get a part time job. Are you ready for what he did? He started an escort service for the football team, and he gave out my mother's phone number!
- Caroline: And I still say getting laid by an 18-year-old linebacker is just what she needs!”

Kevin Spacey - Lloyd
Judy Davis - Caroline