Stupidity quotes

“I'd like to correct an erroneous impression you seem to have about me. You see, I'm not at all stupid. I may sound like I am, but I'm really not.”
Jason Patric - Kevin 'kid' Collins

“- Reggie Hammond: Man, you loaded here. What the fuck's this?
- Torchy's Patron: Tax refund!
- Reggie Hammond: Bullshit! You're too fuckin' stupid to have a job!”

Eddie Murphy - Reggie Hammond
Nick Dimitri - Torchy's Patron

“- Terry Alba: You know, there's something seriously demented about you. Do you know that?
- Sam Burnside: You know, maybe I should've gone to law school.
- Terry Alba: Like I said... demented.”
Dagmara Dominczyk - Terry Alba
Ethan Embry - Sam Burnside

“What's a five-letter word for idiot?”
Matt Frewer - Dr. Chet Wakeman

“- Tony: We've put our heads together, and we've decided we're gonna rip off the Arab, on the road, during the car race.
- Don Don Canneloni: Oh, you put your heads together, huh? It must've sounded like a bowling alley.”
Alex Rocco - Tony
Charles Nelson Reilly - Don Don Canneloni

“- Tweeter: Say I'm stupid and I'm about to get hit in the nuts.
- Billy Bob: That's funny.
- Tweeter: Ain't it funny? That's what I mean. See they need to change the name of the show to America's funniest shots in the nuts.”
Scott Caan - Tweeter
Ron Lester - Billy Bob

“Don't worry. I've got a perfectly good idiot to take the fall for it. Not you, another idiot.”

Glenn Close - Cruella de Vil

“Your cousin May is dumb like a horse, or a dog or something.”
Woody Allen - Ray

“If you're so smart, tell me something, how come you go to M.I.T. for 8 years to become a cable repairman?”
Judd Hirsch - Julius Levinson

“- Harriet: Mom, is there a planet where everyone's dumber than us?
- Mrs. Frankovitz: Sure, that's the one all of Gwen's boyfriends are from.”
Evan Rachel Wood - Harriet Frankovitz
Cathy Moriarty - Mrs. Frankovitz

“I may not be street wise and all that, but at least I’m not that dumb!”
Jennifer Lopez - Selena Quintanilla

“- Mary: I was tired of submerging my identity to a very brilliant, dominating man. He's a genius.
- Isaac: He was a genius, Helen's a genius and Dennis is a genius. You know a lot of geniuses, y'know. You should meet some stupid people once in a while, y'know, you could learn something.”

Diane Keaton - Mary
Woody Allen - Isaac

“- Mr. Herbert Garrison: What is five times two? Now come on children, don't be shy, just give it your best shot.
- Clive: Twelve.
- Mr. Herbert Garrison: OK, now let's try to get an answer from someone who's not a complete retard.”
Trey Parker - Mr. Herbert Garrison

“- Pips: So, what the Mage have to say?
- Crysta: She said I should start getting serious.
- Pips: 'Bout time.
- Crysta: Oh, and stop hanging around with bug-brained layabouts like you.”
Christian Slater - Pips
Samantha Mathis - Crysta

“I was just checking the specs on the endline for the... rotary... girder... I'm retarded.”

Chris Farley - Tommy

“- Leah: Wow, this is huge.
- Osmosis Jones: Don't be all impressed, 'cause 99% of that is just sugar you know.
- Leah: Yeah, and 99% of you is just stupid.
- Osmosis Jones: Ooh, like I haven't heard that one before.”
Brandy Norwood - Leah
Chris Rock - Osmosis Jones

“That's a pretty stupid thing to do during Flu season!”

Macaulay Culkin - Miles Russell

“Smokey, you know I ain't the smartest man in the world, but, from back here it look like you're takin a shit.”
Anthony Johnson - Ezal

“- Armand 'Flash' Carducci: Hi, girls. What's happening? My name's Flash, what's yours?
- Nancy: Don't talk to him, Cheryl, he's a dork.
- Armand 'Flash' Carducci: I'm not a dork, I'm Italian!”
John Mengatti - Armand 'Flash' Carducci
Tammy Taylor - Nancy

“- Jake: Niente. Kids must've cleaned him out.
- Mama Fratelli: Sure, right before they ate him!
- Francis: Stupid.”

Robert Davi - Jake
Anne Ramsey - Mama Fratelli
Joe Pantoliano - Francis

“- Dr. Russell Oakes: Do you understand what's going on in this world?
- Dr. Landowska: Yeah. Stupidity. Has a habit of getting its way.”

Jason Robards - Dr. Russell Oakes
George Petrie - Dr. Landowska

“She only speaks French, Roy. She doesn't speak imbecile.”

John Cusack - Lane Myer

- Marty Pascal: Are you being wise?
- "Jackie-O" Pascal: One day I woke up wise.
- Marty Pascal: One day I woke up stupid.
- "Jackie-O" Pascal: What'd you do?
- Marty Pascal: I went back to bed.
- "Jackie-O" Pascal: That was wise.
Josh Hamilton - Marty Pascal
Parker Posey - "Jackie-O" Pascal

“- Swell: Kenny, why don't you save your last three brain cells, you might need them.
- Kenny: I won't!”
Christina Applegate - Swell
Keith Coogan - Kenny

“- Axel Foley: Wait a second, look. I just thought, that if there was a problem…
- Inspector Todd: Don't think, Axel! It makes my dick itch.”
Eddie Murphy - Axel Foley
Gilbert R. Hill - Inspector Todd