Wife quotes

“- Nick Arden: The moment I saw you I knew...
- Ellen Wagstaff Arden: I bet you say that to all your wives.”
Cary Grant - Nick Arden
Irene Dunne - Ellen Wagstaff Arden

“I want you to meet the finest yes-men in Lousiana and their lovely wives.”

Paul Newman - Gov. Earl K. Long

“Don't think too badly about your wife, Doc. After all, you were locked up in prison. She is a stunningly, healthy young woman.”
James Woods - Jack Benyon

“One time or other, every man is driven crazy by his wife, and in his secret heart, he wants to do exactly what Claus is accused of: kill her in some sly, silent way that can't be detected.”
Ron Silver - Alan Dershowitz

“- Helen Knable: Roy, I don't know where you are, but get your butt back here!
- Spike: Unfortunately, her gutless failure of a husband won't lift a finger to save her. Isn't that right, Roy?
- Roy Knable: No.”

Pam Dawber - Helen Knable
Jeffrey Jones - Spike
John Ritter - Roy Knable

“You're supposed to sleep with the wife, Roedel. Great day, in the mornin' you got to know that much! You're supposed to share her bed. That way, if some other man do that, you shoot him.”
Jeffrey Wright - Daniel Holt

“A good wife lets her husband think that everything's his idea even when it's not.”
Donna Mitchell - Mrs. Warren

“You stand in class and tell us to look beyond the image, but you don't. To you a housewife is someone who sold her soul for a center hall colonial. She has no depth, no intellect, no interests.”

Julia Stiles - Joan Brandwyn

“- Danny Ocean: Phil Turenteen.
- Rusty Ryan: Dead.
- Danny Ocean: No shit. On the job?
- Rusty Ryan: Skin cancer.
- Danny Ocean: Did you send flowers?
- Rusty Ryan: Dated his wife for a while.”
George Clooney - Danny Ocean
Brad Pitt - Rusty Ryan

“- Danny Ocean: How's your wife?
- Bulldog, the Bruiser: Pregnant again.
- Danny Ocean: Well, that happens.”
George Clooney - Danny Ocean
Scott L. Schwartz - Bulldog, the Bruiser

“- Jack Roth: So when do we all get to meet your fabulous friend Beverly?
- Evan M. Wright: I'll give you her number, I'm not seen with her in public my wife wouldn't like it.”
Martin Landau - Jack Roth
Robert De Niro - Evan M. Wright

“- Seth Gecko: Died instantly?
- Jacob Fuller: Not quite. She was trapped in the wreck for about... six hours before she passed on.
- Seth Gecko: Those acts of God really stick it in and break it off, don't they?
- Jacob Fuller: Yes, they do.”

George Clooney - Seth Gecko
Harvey Keitel - Jacob Fuller

“What's the difference between a wife and a job? After 10 years a job still sucks.”
Mel Gibson - Nick Marshall

“- Detective: She's got a violent record, assault with a deadly weapon. Did you know that when you married her?
- Joaquin Manero: It's why I married her.”
Rick Rossovich - Detective
Raul Julia - Joaquin Manero

- "Candy" Johnson: Don't tell me my wife is gonna die. I don't like talk like that.
- Dr. Otis: Take hold of yourself, man. I'm doing my best, but I'm only human.

Clark Gable - "Candy" Johnson
Russell Hicks - Dr. Otis

“- Rose Dewitt Bukater: I am not a foreman in one of your mills that you can command. I am your fiancée.
- Cal Hockley: My fian... my fiancée! Yes, you are, and my wife. My wife in practice if not yet by law, so you will honor me. You will honor me the way a wife is required to honor a husband. Because I will not be made a fool, Rose. Is this in...” (continue)(continue reading)
Kate Winslet - Rose Dewitt Bukater
Billy Zane - Cal Hockley

“I can't believe Vanessa, my bride, my one true love, the woman who taught me the beauty of monogamy, was a fembot all along. Wait a tick, that means I'm single again! Oh, behave!”
Mike Myers - Austin Powers

“My ex-wife left me for another woman.”
Woody Allen - Isaac

- Artie Mitchell: You're the most beautiful woman in this hot tub.
- Jamie the "Actress": So, where's your wife?
- Karen Mitchell: She's right here, asshole!
- Jamie the "Actress": Bitch.
- Artie Mitchell: Honey!
Charlie Sheen - Artie Mitchell
Kim Poirier - Jamie the "Actress"
Nicole de Boer - Karen Mitchell

“- Emily Walburn: How about you? Was there ever a Ms. Payne?
- Maj. Benson Payne: Negative. I figure if the Marines wanted me to have a wife, they would've issued me one.”
Karyn Parsons - Emily Walburn
Damon Wayans - Maj. Benson Payne

“- Lina: What happened to your wife?
- Jakob: They shot her. Under a tree. I don't know what kind of tree it was. I didn't bother to ask.”
Hannah Taylor Gordon - Lina
Robin Williams - Jakob

“- Jade: My first wife used to mow the lawn stark naked.
- Rowdy Abilene: What did your neighbors say?
- Jade: They said I married her for her money.”
Harold Diamond - Jade
Ronn Moss - Rowdy Abilene

“- Sidney Miller: Betty, we should go.
- Constance Miller: Betty was your other wife. I'm Constance.”
Alan Alda - Sidney Miller
Allison Janney - Constance Miller

- John Converse: If you really want to know, I think she's pretty moral, basically.
- Antheil: "Pretty moral, basically?". Oh, Jesus. What a couple of yo-yo's.

Michael Moriarty - John Converse
Anthony Zerbe - Antheil

“What do you think's worse? Losing a father or a wife?”

Nicolas Cage - Little Junior Brown