Eddie Murphy movie quotes

“- Donkey: Don't you worry, I will always be here to make sure no one bothers you.
- Shrek: You're bothering me.”
Eddie Murphy - Donkey
Mike Myers - Shrek

“- Norbit: Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday...
- Rasputia: Say Tuesday again you ain't gonna see Wednesday.”
Eddie Murphy - Norbit
Eddie Murphy - Rasputia

“- Reggie Hammond: You got a lady, Cates?
- Jack Cates: Yeah.
- Reggie Hammond: You know, the generosity of women never ceases to amaze me.”
Eddie Murphy - Reggie Hammond
Nick Nolte - Jack Cates

“Interesting. I've been stabbed, and I've been hanged, and I've been burned. Even broken on the rack once, but I've never been shot before. Kind of itches a little!”

Eddie Murphy - Maximillian

“In some cultures, donkeys are revered as the smartest of animals.”
Eddie Murphy - Donkey

“- Shrek: Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers.
- Donkey: You both have layers. You know, not everybody like onions. Cake! Everybody loves cake! Cakes have layers!
- Shrek: I don't care what everyone likes! Ogres are not like cakes.”

Mike Myers - Shrek
Eddie Murphy - Donkey

“- Charlie Hinton: Maybe we should just ask another question here.
- Jamie: Where do babies come from?
- Charlie Hinton: Y'know, why don't we go back to the dolphins, or something other than that?”
Eddie Murphy - Charlie Hinton
Elle Fanning - Jamie

“Seventy-five years. That's how much time you get if you're lucky. Seventy-five years. Seventy-five Winters. Seventy-five Springtimes. Seventy-five Summers. And Seventy-five Autumns. When you look at it like that, it's not a lot of time, is it? Don't waste them. Get your head out of the rat race and forget about the superficial things that...” (continue)(continue reading)
Eddie Murphy - G'

“Did I ever get a nomination? No! You know why? Cause I hadn't played any of them slave roles, and get my ass whipped. That's how you get the nomination.”

Eddie Murphy - Kit Ramsey

“- Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Terry, tell me something. With all this money coming in from both sides, how does anything ever get done?
- Terry Corrigan: It doesn't. That's the genius of the system.”

Eddie Murphy - Thomas Jefferson Johnson
Kevin McCarthy - Terry Corrigan

“- Shrek: You can't tell me you're afraid of heights?
- Donkey: No, I'm just uncomfortable about being on a rickety bridge over a boiling lake of lava!”
Mike Myers - Shrek
Eddie Murphy - Donkey

“- Teen Attendant: Excuse me ma'am. We have a 300 lb weight limit.
- Rasputia: I don't weigh no damn 300 lbs. I weigh 165!”
Laura Ortiz - Teen Attendant
Eddie Murphy - Rasputia

“- Dr. John Dolittle: You'll be the most famous bear in the world!
- Archie: Bigger than Pooh?
- Dr. John Dolittle: If you get this right, everybody will be saying Winnie the Who!”
Eddie Murphy - Dr. John Dolittle
Steve Zahn - Archie

“- Dr. John Dolittle: Your daughter's turning into a little wise-ass.
- Lisa Dolittle: Worse. She's turning into a little you.”
Eddie Murphy - Dr. John Dolittle
Kristen Wilson - Lisa Dolittle

“- Donkey: Hi, Princess!
- Princess Fiona: It talks!
- Shrek: It's getting him to shut up that's the trick!”
Eddie Murphy - Donkey
Cameron Diaz - Princess Fiona
Mike Myers - Shrek

“- Norbit: This wedding's a shame and I'm here to stop it.
- Kate Thomas: Norbit, what are you doing?
- Norbit: I'm bein' a man for the first time in my life. Kate... Kate, I love you.”

Eddie Murphy - Norbit
Thandie Newton - Kate Thomas

“- John Taggart: You've stolen this house!
- Axel Foley: How the fuck can you steal a house? This is… my uncle's house!”
John Ashton - John Taggart
Eddie Murphy - Axel Foley

“- Donkey: Can you tell my future from these stars?
- Shrek: The stars don't tell the future. They tell stories.”

Eddie Murphy - Donkey
Mike Myers - Shrek

“- Thomas Jefferson Johnson: I've got to do something to help these people.
- Celia Kirby: Don't tell me you're actually developing a conscience.
- Thomas Jefferson Johnson: God I hope not, it's gonna be a fuckin' nuisance in Congress.”
Eddie Murphy - Thomas Jefferson Johnson
Victoria Rowell - Celia Kirby

“You wanna know what's permanent, Sherman? You know what's permanent? I'll tell you. What me and your momma got. That's permanent. That ain't going no place. You know what I mean? I'll tell you, boy. If you find you a woman that loves you, that really really loves you, you gotta hold onto that, Sherman.”
Eddie Murphy - Papa Klump

“- Even Bigger Black Guy: I mean you beatin' 10 cops? You putting a man in the hospital? How come I don't see no bruises on you?
- Big Black Guy: Yeah!
- Billy Ray Valentine: 'Cause I'm a karate man! And a karate man bruises are on the inside! They don't show their weakness.”
James D. Turner - Even Bigger Black Guy
Ron Taylor - Big Black Guy
Eddie Murphy - Billy Ray Valentine

“- Yvonne: You wanna come over for a cup of coffee?
- Marcus: Not even if Jesus was pouring it.”
Tisha Campbell-Martin - Yvonne
Eddie Murphy - Marcus

“- Possum: Hey Doc is there a car named after me?
- Dr. John Dolittle: Naw, I don't think they make a Possum.
- Possum: Why not?
- Dr. John Dolittle: They usually don't make cars named after rodents.”
Isaac Hayes - Possum
Eddie Murphy - Dr. John Dolittle

“Can you put this in a good spot? 'Cause all of this shit happened the last time I parked here.”

Eddie Murphy - Axel Foley

“- Reggie Hammond: Now Jack, the both of us know that I'm gonna be an honest man from now on. Right?
- Jack Cates: Good.
- Reggie Hammond: But if I did decide to be a thief, what makes you think you can catch me?
- Jack Cates: [pause] Can I have my lighter back, Reggie?”
Eddie Murphy - Reggie Hammond
Nick Nolte - Jack Cates