Theft quotes

“- Jones: Those pelts are stolen.
- Elk Dog: You all have stolen everything from us. Everything! The land. The animals.”
Lukas Haas - Jones
Duane Howard - Elk Dog

“- Butt-head: This sucks.
- Beavis: Yeah. It really sucks.
- Butt-head: This sucks more than anything that's ever sucked before. We must find this butt-hole that took our TV.”

Mike Judge - Butt-Head
Mike Judge - Beavis

“- John McClane: So that's is what this is about, Hans? A fucking robbery?
- Hans Gruber: Put down the gun.
- John McClane: Why'd you have to nuke the whole building, Hans?
- Hans Gruber: Well, when you steal $600, you can just disappear. When you steal 600 million, they will find you, unless they think you're already dead.”
Bruce Willis - John McClane
Alan Rickman - Hans Gruber

“- Dave Shilling: What's down there?
- Terry Leather: It's a pile of skeletons.
- Dave Shilling: You're joking. Let's hope they're not the last gang who tried to take this bank.”

Daniel Mays - Dave Shilling
Jason Statham - Terry Leather

“- Tom Beck: Mind me asking how much one of these costs?
- Lloyd Gallagher: No.
- Tom Beck: How much?
- Lloyd Gallagher: I don't know.
- Tom Beck: You don't know? What did you do, steal it?
- Lloyd Gallagher: Yeah.”

Michael Nouri - Tom Beck
Kyle MacLachlan - Lloyd Gallagher

“- Pee-wee Herman: Exhibit D: Jimmy what is this? Too late! Chip!
- Chip: It looks like a pen.
- Pee-wee Herman: Exactly! I bought this pen exactly one hour before my bike was stolen. Why? What's the significance? I don't know!”
Paul Reubens - Pee-wee Herman
Damon Martin - Chip

“- Billy Hayes: What about you? What are you in for?
- Erich: Hashish. 90% of the foreigners here are in for hashish or drug related charges from smuggling to posession. My advice is you get yourself a very good lawyer and try to argue down the charge you face. If they make it posession, the sentance is lighter.”
Brad Davis - Billy Hayes
Norbert Weisser - Erich

“- Rudy Steiner: You're stealing books? Why?
- Liesel Meminger: When life robs you, sometimes you have to rob it back.”
Nico Liersch - Rudy Steiner
Sophie Nélisse - Liesel Meminger

“- Lynn Watson: You stole that.
- Ms. Jones: No, I didn't. I confiscated it. There's a difference.
- Lynn Watson: No, there's not.”

Courtney Chase - Lynn Watson
Roma Maffia - Ms. Jones

“- Christina Crawford (child): My babies! Someone stole both my babies!
- Joan Crawford: That's good, darling. They were thoughtless, selfish, spoiled children. Now they won't wake you up when you need your rest.”

Mara Hobel - Christina Crawford (child)
Faye Dunaway - Joan Crawford

“- Butch Cassidy: What happened to the old bank? It was beautiful.
- Guard: People kept robbing it.
- Butch Cassidy: Small price to pay for beauty.”
Paul Newman - Butch Cassidy
Rico Cattani - Bank Guard

“- Malak: I think we made the merchant angry.
- Conan: Are you surprised?
- Malak: But we didn't steal everything he had!
- Conan: We didn't have time.”
Tracey Walter - Malak
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Conan

“Bob's like a rabbit, in and out and no nonsense. That goes for a lot more than a hospital pharmacy.”
Kelly Lynch - Dianne

“Besides, what the hell could we lose? Either we get the money or we get caught. We're winners either way.”

George Burns - Joe

“- Marty Berger: Where the hell have you been, Binford? I could have you arrested for stealing company property!
- Eric Binford: I needed wheels, Mr. Berger.
- Marty Berger: That's not an answer. Why can't you buy a car with the insurance money that your aunt left you?”
Norman Burton - Marty Berger
Dennis Christopher - Eric Binford

“I used to steal a lot. But I don't do that anymore, because I believe in karma.”
Andy Dick

“- Captain Klaus Woermann: What the hell are you doing? Answer!
- Lutz: The silver crosses, sir. There's talk among the men. They hide silver here. Treasure, sir.
- Captain Klaus Woermann: Private Lutz, it's been a profitable day for you! Not only have you learned the crosses are made of nickel, not silver, but you have earned yourself a place on...” (continue)(continue reading)
Jürgen Prochnow - Woermann
John Vine - Lutz

So I'm backing out the door, right, and I got the TV, like this; it was a big old thing, I couldn't see shit; suddenly I hear this voice, "Police, kid, hands in the air". You know, I was standing there, holdin' on to that TV, so finally the voice says, "you hear what I said, boy?". And I say, "yes sir, I sure did, but if I drop this fucking... (continue)(continue reading)
Gil Bellows - Tommy

“- Rod Tidwell: I feel for you, man. But a real man wouldn't shoplift the pootie from a single mom.
- Jerry Maguire: I didn't shoplift the pootie.
[Rod Tidwell gives him a long Look]
- Jerry Maguire: All right. I shoplifted the pootie.”
Cuba Gooding Jr. - Rod Tidwell
Tom Cruise - Jerry Maguire

“- Wrestling Promoter: You coulda taken that guy apart! Now he's gonna get away with my money!
- Peter Parker: I missed the part where that's my problem.”

Larry Joshua - Wrestling Promoter
Tobey Maguire - Peter Parker

“- Dave Shilling: I don't know anything about a bank robbery. Honest.
- Lew Vogel: Still an unconvincing actor, Mr. Shilling.”
Daniel Mays - Dave Shilling
David Suchet - Lew Vogel

“- Casey Mathis: These assholes are trying to steal my iPhone!
- David Clark: Wait, you have an iPhone? Aren't you homeless?
- Casey Mathis: So? Fuck you, dude!”
Emma Roberts - Casey Mathis
Jason Sudeikis - David Clark

“- Joe: That makes everything harder to trace.
- Al: Boy, you must have done some stealing during the war.”
George Burns - Joe
Art Carney - Al

“- Ernie Mullins: Hey, where'd you get that apple?
- Mike Lafebb: Out there.
- Ernie Mullins: Next time you want an apple, you buy it!”
Burt Reynolds - Ernie Mullins
Casey Siemaszko - Mike Lafebb

“- Lew Vogel: We had some weekender thieves break into the vault and robbed it. So if your box is in the one hundred to four hundred numbers, I'm afraid all your stuff will be gone. Mine too, unhappily.
- Michael X: What? How can this happen in London?
- Lew Vogel: I promise you it has happened, and I promise you these thieves will be found and...” (continue)(continue reading)
David Suchet - Lew Vogel
Peter De Jersey - Michael X