Theft quotes

“- Will Turner: We're going to steal a ship? That ship?
- Jack Sparrow: Commandeer. We're going to commandeer that ship. Nautical term.”
Orlando Bloom - Will Turner
Johnny Depp - Jack Sparrow

“- Thomas Jefferson Johnson: Terry, tell me something. With all this money coming in from both sides, how does anything ever get done?
- Terry Corrigan: It doesn't. That's the genius of the system.”

Eddie Murphy - Thomas Jefferson Johnson
Kevin McCarthy - Terry Corrigan

“You are afraid of burglars or you are trying to attract every insect in Cuesta Verde?”

James Karen - Mr. Teague

“- Brian Hope: It's like Robin Hood, you see? We stole from the rich to give to the poor.
- Sister Superior: Who are you going to give this money to?
- Brian Hope: Us. We're poor.”
Janet Suzman - Brian Hope

“- Harry Lime: [opens the cash register and steals money from it] Merry Christmas, Harry.
- Marv Merchants: [opens the money chest and steals money from it] Happy Hanukkah, Marv.”
Joe Pesci - Harry Lime
Daniel Stern - Marv Merchants

“- Sister Superior: You stole money because you want to get out of organized crime?
- Brian Hope: Oh, it was stolen already.”
Janet Suzman - Sister Superior
Eric Idle - Brian Hope

“- Bret Maverick: Oh shut up. I don't want to go to bed with you, lady.
- Annabelle Bransford: Why not?
- Bret Maverick: Why not? I'd be too frightened. God knows what parts of me you'd steal. I'd wake up with all sorts of things missing.”

Mel Gibson - Bret Maverick
Jodie Foster - Annabelle Bransford

“She stole that tie! It's the prefect crime; girls don't wear ties! Although some do; it's not a perfect crime, but it's a good crime.”

Dudley Moore - Arthur Bach

“- Glenda Gardenia Parks: Chester, the only reason I made you a chauffeur is to keep you from stealing. Why are you doing this to me?
- Chester: Because I want to be as good a chauffeur as I am a stealer.
- Glenda Gardenia Parks: Well, there's a certain sincere logic in that I suppose.”

Goldie Hawn - Glenda Parks
T.K. Carter - Chester

“Just a minute. Robin Hood steals money from my pocket, forcing me to hurt the public, and they love him for it?
[Scribe nods] That's it then. Cancel the kitchen scraps for lepers and orphans, no more merciful beheadings, and call off Christmas.”
Alan Rickman - Sheriff George of Nottingham

“- Micky Rosa: You steal 'The Bible', you go to Hell. That's the way it works.
- Choi: Like I'm not going already.”
Kevin Spacey - Micky Rosa
Aaron Yoo - Choi

“- Osbourne Cox: Some clown, or two clowns, have gotten a hold of my memoirs.
- Katie Cox: Your what?
- Osbourne Cox: Stolen it, or I don't know...
- Katie Cox: Your what?
- Osbourne Cox: My memoirs, the book I'm writing.
- Katie Cox: Well why in God's name would anyone think that's worth anything?”
John Malkovich - Osborne Cox
Tilda Swinton - Katie Cox

“Armed robbery. With a replica. I mean, how the fuck can it be armed robbery with a fucking replica?”
Robert Carlyle - Begbie

“- Kamran Shah: It's all a mistake. I stole nothing!
- Jailer: You can tell Allah. When you see him.”
Art Malik - Kamran Shah
Ken Sharrock - Jailer

“- Zeke: This is where I get my equipment.
- Marybeth: You borrow it from science labs?
- Zeke: I like to think of it as stealing actually.”
Josh Hartnett - Zeke Tyler
Laura Harris - Marybeth Louise Hutchinson

“One. Close the door. Two. Open the safe. Three. On the floor.”

Kirk Douglas - Cactus Jack

“- Reggie Hammond: Now Jack, the both of us know that I'm gonna be an honest man from now on. Right?
- Jack Cates: Good.
- Reggie Hammond: But if I did decide to be a thief, what makes you think you can catch me?
- Jack Cates: [pause] Can I have my lighter back, Reggie?”
Eddie Murphy - Reggie Hammond
Nick Nolte - Jack Cates

“- Mrs. Jones: Planning on stealing something?
- Elliot Moore: No, ma'am, we're not.
- Mrs. Jones: Plan on murdering me in my sleep?
- Elliot Moore: What? No!”
Betty Buckley - Mrs. Jones
Mark Wahlberg - Elliot Moore

“- Roz: Did you steal this from the house?
- Frank: No.
- Roz: ...Honey?
- Frank: Yes.”
Sandra Bullock - Roz
Denis Colin Leary - Francis 'Frank' O'Brien

“- Buyer: I tell you what, I'll give you 1,500 for everything.
- Don: 1,500? Come on, man. This stuff holds a lot of sentimental value.
- Buyer: To who?
- Don: To the poeple I stole it from.
- Buyer: I don't care about them. 1,500.”
Danny McBride - Don

“Ladies and gentlemen, I want to thank you all for your cooperation. Now, stay down on the floor 'til I'm gone and have a good day.”

Geena Davis - Thelma

“- Miles Urquart: What about this model you're screwing? What promises have you made to keep her in line?
- Tim Everett: None that can't be broken. Look, she's our only tie to the bank operation. If things do go belly up, it'll only take one cut to sever the knot.”
Peter Bowles - Miles Urquart
Richard Lintern - Tim Everett

“- Jesus Ramirez: They accused me of robbing several banks. But, no way! I was drunk and all; but I'm positive I only robbed one bank. How about you?
- Skip Donahue: Oh, my friend and I were doing this song and dance act...
- Jesus Ramirez: Oh, must have been pretty bad.”
Miguel Ángel Suárez - Jesus Ramirez
Gene Wilder - Skip Donahue

“Don't piss in my pocket and tell me it's raining!”
Dragan Micanovic - Dragan

“I am not a bus driver! I do not work for the bus company! All right? I... I needed a ride to New Mexico, so I stole this uniform! See this jacket? This is not my jacket! Remember Marty, the bus driver? Huh? This is his shirt! I stole it! And these pants, you think I'd wear these pants? These aren't my pants! These are Marty's pants. I stole...” (continue)(continue reading)

Cuba Gooding Jr. - Owen Templeton