Drunkenness quotes

“The fact is, Morgan is an uncivilized brute. Sometimes he drinks heavily. A night like this will set him going and once he's drunk he's rather dangerous.”
Ernest Thesiger - Horace Femm

“- Peter McGowan: Are you drunk or something?
- Larry: What time is it?
- Peter McGowan: Four.
- Larry: Yep.”
Sir Kenneth Branagh - Peter McGowan
Peter Riegert - Larry

“- Alec Newbary: You're being arrested for drunk driving.
- Billy Hicks: Drunk definitely, I don't know if you could call it driving.”
Ally Sheedy - Alec Newbary
Rob Lowe - Billy Hicks

“- Father Ritley: Thomas Smith?
- Thomas: Here! But I don't know where here is man, 'cause I'm so wasted man!”
Mark McKinney - Father Ritley
Rob Stefaniuk - Thomas

“- Deputy Brent: Let me drive.
- Sheriff Frank: No, you're drunk.
- Deputy Brent: You always get to drive.
- Sheriff Frank: That's cause I'm the sheriff, asshole.”
Jonathan Banks - Deputy Brent
Scott Brady - Sheriff Frank

“Felix, for the last 40 years I've lived a life of dedicated debauchery. I've consumed enough booze to destroy a dozen healthy livers. I've filled my lungs with enough nicotine to poison the entire population of Orange County. I've engaged in sexual excesses that make Caligula look like a celibate monk. I have, in fact, conscientiously, day in...” (continue)(continue reading)
William M. Holden - Tim Culley

“- Ben Sanderson: Why am I a drunk? Is that really what you wanna ask me?
- Sera: Yes.
- Ben Sanderson: Well, then, this is our first date, or our last. Until now I wasn't sure it was either.”
Nicolas Cage - Ben Sanderson
Elisabeth Shue - Sera

“We get in there and get wrecked, then we'll eat a pork pie, then we'll drop a couple of Surmontil-50's each. That means we'll miss out Monday but come up smiling Tuesday morning.”

Richard R. Grant - Withnail

“- Nancy Kendricks: Alex is a writer.
- Mrs. Connelly: Oh, a writer. I always thought of that as more of a hobby than a real job. I suppose I'm forgetting about Joyce.
- Alex Rose: Joyce. James Joyce. Of course. Wonderful writer.
- Mrs. Connelly: He died drunk and penniless.”
Drew Barrymore - Nancy Kendricks
Eileen Essell - Mrs. Connelly
Ben Stiller - Alex Rose

“- Raychel: What are you on?
- Meg Kennedy: What am I on? It's just two glasses of wine and a couple of valium. You want some?
- Raychel: Valium? Who the fuck takes valium anymore?”
Mariah Carey - Raychel
Mira Sorvino - Meg Kennedy

“- Harry Dunne: I hate when women do that. She wanted to see you again! And now no? Now... wait a minute! Wait! She must have meant ten o' clock at night!
- Lloyd Christmas: Do you think?
- Harry Dunne: Why would she have you meet her in a bar at ten in the morning?
- Lloyd Christmas: I just figured she was a raging alcoholic.”

Jeff Daniels - Harry Dunne
Jim Carrey - Lloyd Christmas

“- Miss Schermerhorn: Is that man drunk?
- Happy Jack Mulraney: Och, dead as Good Friday, miss.”
Barbara Bouchet - Mrs. Schermerhorn
John C. Reilly - Happy Jack Mulraney

“I drink a quart a day. It's vodka so you couldn't smell it.”
Meg Ryan - Alice Green

“- Rocky Dennis: I hate you going out every night and coming home wasted all the time!
- Rusty Dennis: It's none of your goddamn business!
- Rocky Dennis: You're my mother!
- Rusty Dennis: Well, you're not my warden!”
Eric Stoltz - Rocky Dennis
Cher - Rusty Dennis

“Beer makes you drunk. I drank beer once, with my friend Connie. I fell down and scraped my knee.”
Toby Radloff - Dickie

“- Judy: I wanna know how you two met.
- Nora: I picked him up in a bar. How's that?
- Max: I was drunk, and she was drunk, and I liked her looks so I convinced her to let me bring her home, and I seduced her on the sofa bed, and it was magic, and I keep coming back for more.”
Eileen Brennan - Judy
Susan Sarandon - Nora Baker
James Spader - Max Baron

“The only disease that can survive in our bloodstreams is alcoholism.”
Maggie Smith - Caro Eliza Bennett

“First divorce: wife's hidden sexuality, not my fault. Second divorce: said the wrong name at the altar, kind of my fault. Third divorce: they shouldn't let you get married when you're that drunk and have stuff drawn all over your face, Nevada's fault.”
David Schwimmer - Dr. Ross Geller

“Promise me one thing: don't take me home until I'm drunk... Very drunk indeed.”
Audrey Hepburn - Holly Golightly

“I love you Scully. That's not the booze talkin' either.”
John Candy - Jack Chester

“- Harris: Harris. From Wheatley in Oxfordshire.
- Richard Sharpe: And previously?
- Harris: A courtier to my lord Bacchus and an unremitting debtor.
- Richard Sharpe: You're a rake and a wastrel, Harris. Is there anything you can do?
- Harris: I can read, sir.”
Jason Salkey - Harris
Sean Bean - Sharpe

“Why did I get drunk? I do stupid things when I'm drunk... like sleep with my husband!”
Keri Russell - Jenna Hunterson

“- Frederick: I'll just have a drink.
- Renata: Right! Drink yourself unconcious. That's the sort of writer's cliche you've never had trouble adjusting to.”
Richard Jordan - Frederick
Diane Keaton - Renata

“- Nora Charles: What hit me?
- Nick Charles: The last martini.”

Myrna Loy - Nora Charles
William Powell - Nick Charles

“- Barney: Oh, shit. You drank me out of tequila.
- Zach: It was a dirty job, but somebody had to do it.”
John Ritter - Zach
Vincent Gardenia - Barney